LTE Awards: August 2007

Hola! Welcome to the new year of the LTE "Titi" Awards. The sun has set for the LTE Year 2006-2007. A new day, a new year, has come. Tonight's Award will open a new set of Titi Winners for LTE year 2007-2008. 12 spots are open for everybading! So who are the TOP 10 contenders vying for the first Titi of our 2nd year? Drew..... paki-announce!

"Ay! Hello po! You like my boobs ba? Big ano? Talo ang Quinto girl ninyo! Pati na rin yung ke Prieto! Walang bra yan! Type nyo?

Aaay! Enough of me na muna. Back to the announcement na tayo. Sino sino kaya ang kokoronahan ng last month's Titi winner na si Oxana bruha? Sa dinami-daming pang-ookray, pangpatawa, pang-painis, pang-eksenadora, at kung ano pa... eto ang mga stars sa month ng August 2007.

Beginning with....."

Empress Maruja in Speeches N' Creme

(On LTE' "Titi" Award Winners' Speeches) Gusto ko lang pong linawin na ang haba ng acceptance speech ay hindi nangangahulugang mahaba rin ang aktwal na Titi. Unfair kay Megan. (who gave the shortest speech and the only certified female to own a Titi).

Drew says: Hoy Maruja... patunayan mo nga! Anong size ka nga ba talaga? Size ng Havainas mo, bruha!

Maui in LTE History: How We Met

Friends are the only people that loves to hate you, yet hates to love you... still loves you nonetheless. (Sa awayang Ekra and Lyka)

Drew says: At saan mo naman nakuha to? Agree ba kayo sa babaeng to? Words of Wisdom toh! Pwede pang Quotable Quotes sa Reader's Digest.

Kiss My Mike in The Grand Titi

Ayyy! Gusto ko rin ng titi! Maraming maraming titi! (On Bananas winning the most Titi Awards and being nominated the most for a Titi in LTE Year 2006-2007)

Drew says: Bongga ang Kiss My Mike na toh! Group sex ang drama! Tse!

Bananas in The Grand Titi

(On Winning The Grand Titi) Nawala lang ako ng saglit, ang dami nang naganap? Shit!.... Shit!..... Nakaapak ako ng shit!

Drew says: Siyeeeet! Papatok kaya ang mga "Siyeeeet" ng Bananas? Tanong natin ke Consolisa Laguardia.

Kiks in Three Q's for the Queers

(On Lea Salonga) Questionable ang sekswalidad ng Leah Salonga. Parang hindi sya tao. Have you seen her nose swell to German tunnel proportions? I go for Monique........ Monique Lhuillier.

Drew says: Ang taray! Yun Lang!

Oxana Olafski in Three Q's for the Queers

(On Regine Velasquez) Regine is a man stealer and more of a threat to the institution of marriages than homosexuals are.

Drew says: Pang Ruffa Gutierez ang comment ng Lolah! Short yet precise! Tse!

Maui in Three Q's for the Queers

(On Regine versus Lea) Huwag ikumpara ang langit at lupa, dahil ang kalalabasan nito ay PUTIK!!!..... (On Regine) Ang tae, balutan mu man ng ginto ay tae pa rin.

Drew says: Ang mga Siyeeet ng Bananas... lalong bumaho! Effective kaya?

Goddess in Three Q's for the Queers

(Response to Maui's comment) I agree, tae balutan mo man ng ginto tae pa rin, pero sino naman tangang tao ang magbabalot sa tae ng ginto? Ah,.... si LEA "at ginagawa ko ito ng nakangiti" SALONGA.

Drew says: Di namin mapigilan ang tawa sa "at ginawa ko ito ng nakangiti" lines ng Goddess of the mountain top na toh! She's got it! Yeah, baby, she;s got it!

Mrs J in The Lost Boy

(ON LTE's entry about former heart throb Corey Haim) Hay.. naalala ko tuloy si DEVON SAWA! Ang actor na nagparealize na habol ko din pala ay batuta!

Drew says: Bakla na bakla ang gagah! Kakainis!

Bryan Anthony in Walang Utak sa Ganda

I believe...... in God the father almighty! (On how Miss Teen South Carolina should have answered her question on why most Americans cannot locate their country in the map.)

Drew says: Religious ang Bryan ha! Member kaya sya ng Victory Church nina Piolo and Sam.... (at Erika Santos?)

----O-----

Drew: O? Ano pa ng hinhintay nyo? Vote na! Top 3 ninyo in ordah plz! Your votes will be added to the choices made by the sisters of LTE to decide who will receive the Titi trophy. The new winnah will be announced on September 5. Good luck sa mga bruhang nominada! Tse!

Tandang Sora

Ayoko kong tumanda! Gosh.... nafe-feel ko na ngayon ang phobia ng katandaan. Remember ko ang post ni Megan about this issue. Ngayon lang ako tinamaan.

Biglang napag-isip ako at 34. Medyo nabawasan na ang Kuya-Ate terms of respect ko. Ako na ngayon ang tinatawag na Kuya. Almost everyday, naririrnig ko toh. As in ngayon ko lang talaga na notice toh.

Sa work, akala ko ka-age ko pa ang mga ka-churva ko, hindi na pala. Kuya here and Kuya there na ang heard ko from them. Biglang terrified ang bakla. Tinaasan ang 401K retirement plan kaagad, binawasan ang pagyoyosi, uminon ng green tea, at nag-moisturize! Ching!

I asked Mama O kung feel nya rin na tumanda sya. Ang bruha! Hindi raw. Ngayon nya nga lang raw talaga na feel ang Life. I dunno what he meant by that. Pls expand nga Mama O... Ang sagot: Mas interesting raw ang Sex Life nya ngayon compared nung 20's sya. Gandara ang Lola!

The thought of getting old as a gay man... kakainis. Ekra once said that its ok for a gay man to grow old... as long as he has friends around him. Friends who really care ha. Kelly, having two kids, (i bet) has nothing to worry about. Blood is thicker that water kung baga. I thought of my nephews and nieces... but i dont expect too much from them. They have their own lives to live too.

All I can say is.... with friends or no friends; with kids or no kids; with BF or none, the thought of reaching old age is scary and sad di ba? Watch nyo ang video ng mga thundercats below. Nalungkot ako. Pambihira!

Song of the Week: Hoppipolla from my fave, Sigur Ros.


Or maybe at this age of 34, getting old like Mary Walter is scary. As we age, our thoughts develop naman. Our needs change. Remember Maslow's? As long as we reach self-actualization, we'll be fine. I remember when I was in High School, I thought of age 30's as old... pero ngayon, isip-isip ko, hindi naman pala. I have much to achieve pa... too much to do... I still have plenty of time. Vavoooo!

I WENT Out To LUKE.

Siyet! Eto na ba? Confirmed na ba to? Kakainiiiiiis!

Ayan, dati balita-balita lang... ngayon magkasama na talaga. Ang Papa Wentworth Miller (Prison Break) at Luke McFarlane (Brothers and Sisters) , magkasama na talaga! At mukhang happy talaga ang Papa Went sa mga pics na toh ha (from the First Church of Wentworth Miller). Contented ang bruha! Swerte ang Luke. Inis Veneracion ketch! Tse!

Papaano na lang si TR Knight (dating BF ni Luke)? Sadyang iniwan para kay Papa Went. Umiyak kaya sa shoulders ni Sandra Oh? Siyet! Pang Grace Anotomy talaga ang drama. Buti na lang wala na ang Isaiah!

Kahit hurt aketch, eto para kina Papa Went and Luke: Good Luck kung totoo nga toh! (Sino kaya sa kanila ang botomista? Ching!) Jackpot na naman ang Perez Hilton kung totoo nga ang chism.... at mukhang totoo nga! Kaka-inis!

Walang Utak Sa Ganda!

Ladies, please welcome, Miss Teen South Carolina!



Aaaay!... No comment na kang ketch!

Question: Kung ganyan ka kaganda at ganyan din ka tanga, payag ka?

Mahirap ang tanong ha! Pakisagot nga mga lola!

Drag Brad

OMG! Look at Brad Pitt!

Bakit ba naka-damit babae ang ating Papa Brad? Yan ba ang fetish ng Tita Angie? Chos!. Noo! Brad is producing an unusual TV show with Nip/Tuck's Ryan Murphy about the metamorphosis of a man who realizes he is transsexual raw. Kaya ayun, nag-drag ang Brad para pag-uusapan na kaagad?

Kahit naka drag, sexy pa rin! Papa pa rin! Hindi maitago ang pagkalalaki nito! Eh kung si Tom Cruise kaya, magdamit babae? Gosh...... baka hihimitayin ang most of the bakla! Aaaah-chu!

Rodrigo, Skeet, Freddie

The Face by Lyka:
Rodrigo Santoro
(Italian-Brazilian)

Ang sabi nga ni Papa Rod: "There is that stereotype of the Latin lover. Maybe it's our vision of the world or our values, but there is something about the Latin culture that is romantic." True ka dyan papa.

I cant wait to see you again sa aking fave TV show, ang Lost. Akala ko kasi dead ka na doon. Awaiting kamio sa pagbabalik mo.... Oh btw, Congatulations pala sa pinaka-bading mong itsura. Ang taray mo lola!

The Kelly-Kelly Pose
Skeet Ulrich
(American)

Eto naman si Papa Skeet double Kellies kaagad ang pinalabas. Teynks Pa! Eto naman ang sabi nya: "I was horrible in Boys Don't Cry, in my opinion, and I was hyped for it, and that's a weird thing to deal with". Hay naku, kahit saan, lyk ka pa rin namin dahil sa mga cute mong eyes. Mapa- Jericho man or Scream.

The Ekra Bulge:
Freddie Ljungberg
(Swedish)

Buti ka pa papa Fred, footballer na, CK model pa! Ano naman kaya ang sasabihin mo sa amin.

Freddie says "We have a lot of guys having to play in different positions, especially at the back. They're not used to it and they're doing the best they can. We know that and can't expect any more from them." Aaaay! Of course am sure the LTE readers would like to play with you in different positions.... we'll give our backs to you! Chos!

-----O-----

Extra! Extra!
Caulfieldism went private!

Ano ba ang nangyari kay Pat? Me nakaka-alam ba? Open lang po sa invited readers ang blog nya ngayon ha.... at hindi invited ang LTE. Tse!

Pumuti na ang Ekra!

Thanks to Empress Maruja for this astonishing and flirtatious banner. Bongga diva? At ang Ekra, pumuti dito ha! The wonders of Magic Cream for your skin talagah. Kalokah!

-----O-----

Song of the Week: From King Biscuit Time, it's I Walk The Earth. First heard sa Queer As Folk. Listen below or watch sa sidebar. Vavooooo!

Si Aida at ang Amazona

Even the greatest of our Superheroes can develop AIDS, everyone can be affected. That is what this French AIDS campaign is all about. Kaya, protect yourself na. Lahat!

What we like about this campaign is, despite the illness, Wonder Woman's breasts remain full and vibrant. Chos!

So who will be next? Cinderella? Tarzan? Frodo Baggins and Sam Gamgee? Kokey? or Ikaw? Kaya, mag-ingat mga girls!

-----O-----

Introducing..... AJ Sotteau


<---- AJ Sotteau in Walang Himala Part 2

Paki explain nga ang photo na to, AJ. Mukhang galing ka sa CR ng Shangrila Mall at may ginawang himala doon with your Rosary Rosal. At ang Louie Claparols shirt mo ay naging Juicy Couture. At parang kazi-zip mo lang ng Seven For All Mankind mong jeans na nabili mo sa UK-UK. Please lang ha! Take caution at baka si Wonder Woman (above) ang kalabasan mo.


Ayan! Isa sa mga blogless Bitches na me Blog na ngayon. Introducing AJ Sotteau and his Rants and Raves

The Lost Boy

The Teen Corey

I used to fancy Corey Haim when I was just a little girl, I asked my mother, what would I be? Chos!..... Yiz! Sobra ang crush koh kay Corey noon. Izza Ignacio sya sa mga unang artistang crush koh (together with Richard Gere, Gabby Concepcion, and Lito Gruet).

Pangarap kong maging BF noon si Corey. Yung smile nya kasi. Siyet. And the mata. Kakainis! Watch koh ang The Lost Boys with my brothers noon at pinipigilan ko lang ang tili. Mahirap ha! Di ko nga napansin si Jason Patric noon eh. Focused kasi talagah ke Corey!

Kaya now, when i found out na meron palang bagong reality show ang Corey Haim called The Two Corey's (with Corey Feldman) talagang hinanap ko sa YouTube. Gosh! Naiba na ang tingin ko. Bakit ba sya nagkaganito? Wiz maintain mga badetch!

Balita ko kasi, na-addict sa Valium ang bruho kaya lost na sya. Sayang Corey Haim. Lost Boy Corey ka na talagah.

The 'Now' Corey

On second thoughts, pwede pa rin si Papa Corey! Kahit di na kumikislap ang bituin nya, sana mapagbigyan ulit. Kakaawa nga eh (watch video from The Two Corey's below).

Ang buhay showbiz talaga. Mahirap i-maintain ang stardom ha. Kaya ayaw kong mag-artista noon eh, kahit daming nagsasabi na pwede ako. Chos!

Corey Haim as a Teen Star and his Regrets now.

After watching the videos, wonder lang ketch kung ano kaya ang mangyayari kina Zac Efron at Dakota Fanning 20 years from now?

-----O-----

Ang sabi nga ni Tita Corey:

“I've reached a point in life where it's no longer necessary to try to impress. If they like me the way I am, that's good. If they don't, that's too bad.”

Sagot ni Corey-na Sanchez:

"Ay ewan ko sa inyo. Basta akoh, di pa laos! May ka-love team kasi ako. Effective talagah ang love team love team na toh. Di ba Mar?"

At ang Corey-ana, may gusto ring sasabihin:

"Uwi na nga lang ako ng Corey-a dahil laos na akoh. Wait na lang kayo sa pagbabalik ko. Gagawa rin kami ng reality show ni Hero. Tse!"

Ang Lesson: Wag mag-pills!

Dubai Diaries: Page 1

Dubai....

Wala po si Claudine at Aga dito.... Si Lyka lang po. Ito'y mga karanasan ng isang Filipinianang bading sa Dubai, United Arab Emirates. Opo, 5 years din po ako sa Dubai. Maraming karanasan sa mga Papang Arabo doon. Tarush! Eto po ang kwento koh:

(WARNING: Kung under 18 kayo or sinusumpa si Xerex Xaviera, wag nyo ng ituloy basahin toh. I, thank you!)

1997 po ng ako'y dumating sa Dubai. 24 years old lang po ako noon. Medyo sariwa pero touched na. Siyet! Ang daming gwapo, sabi koh! Me mapuputi at me maiitim din palang Arabo. Yan ang unang na-notice koh!

Visit Visa lang ako noon kaya super hanap ng trabaho kaagad. 1 week pa lang ang bakla, me naranasan na kaagad.

1st Case: Mosen

Me nakilala akong Pinoy sa first job interview session ko doon. Si Mario (di tunay na pangalan). OK naman ang kalabasan ng interview at sabay uwi na kami ni Mario. Iba ang inu-uwian ng bagong kaibigang Mario. Kung South ako, North sya. Pero wait pa rin kami ng bus together.

Ang tagal ng bus at sobrang init noon. Gusto ko ng mag-taxi pero save ang pera muna. Kami lang ang nasa Bus Stop noon. Kwentuhan na lang kami ng Mario. Nang biglang may pumarada na Range Rover sa harap namin.

Baba ang tinted window ng car at.... "Hello, my friends", sabi ng Arabo. "Siyet ang gwapo" isip koh. "Where are you going?" tanong ng Arabo with an accent. Maria Clara ang drama koh. Di ko pansin. Pero ang Mario, Vida Doria ang gagah. Sabay lapit at sinagot ang tanong ng Arabo. "Me? Sharjah". "How about your friend?" tanong ng gwapong Arabo habang smile sa kin. Syet! Sobrang init at natutunaw ako! "He lives in Karama" sagot ng Mario. "I am going there, you want a ride?" tanong sa kinng Papa.

As in pinatunayan kong Maria Clara pa rin ako. (Ang totoo, takot ako). Di ako sumagot. Ang Mario, Vida Doria pa rin. "Pare, sumama ka na! Mukhang mabait naman eh. Ganon sila dito, friendly. Wag kang matakot". At this time, me bus na dumadating. Bus for Sharjah itets. "Pare, yun na ang bus ko! Sumama ka na!" last words ni Mario that day.

Walang magawa ang Lyka, sumama na rin lang dahil natakot mag-isa at sobrang init na no. Pasok ako sa Range Rover. Zooom.... ang bilis ng lokoh. Natakot ako. Pero mukhang mabait nga ang Arabong ito. Introduce ourselves na.... Mosen raw ang pangalan nya. Sa customs nagtratrabaho. 24 years old din. Kwento dito kwento doon. Tama naman ang way nya patungong amin. Kaya medyo kampante na koh.

"You have smooth hands" ang next line ng Mosen. Kinuha ang left hand koh. Hinimas himas. at bigla na lang nilagay sa India Arie nya. "Nakuh! Ano eto?" tanong ko sa sarili koh. "Peke ba toh?" Tinaas na ang dishdasha (robe) at biglang lumabas ang pinaka malaking India Arie na nakita koh! "Kabayo! Kabayo ito" isip-isip koh. Di na mapigilan ng Lyka. Super himas himas na rin habang napatingin sa road kunwari. Siyet!

Inakbayan ako ng Mosen. "You're beautiful" sabi nya. Miss Universe ang feeling koh! Napa-smile ala Jennifer Hawkins. Na-stop ang smile ng biglang binaba ng Mosen ang kamay nya. "Ano naman toh?" isip isip ko. Hanggang natuklasan ng Papa ang butas ko. Gosh....., naka low waist kasi ketch at walang belt kaya pasok ang kamay ng lokong! Tommy Hil Finger etoh! Kalokah!

"Nooo!" sabi koh. "Its ok, ill be gentle" sabi ng Mosen. Buti na lang gentle-man nga ang Mosen kaya payag na lang koh. Out na ang spirit ni Maria Clara sa katawan koh. Malandi na koh. Tommy HilFinger nya koh.... habang up and down naman ang kamay ko sa kabayo. Lahat ng ito'y habang nag-didrive ang bruho.

A street in Al Karama, Dubai (pic grabbed from Wikipedia)

Karama na pala di ko pansin. Off na ang kamay koh at out na rin ang sa kanya. "Do you live alone? Do you want to continue?" tanong nya. Eh me flat-mates ako eh. Tita ko pa. Siyet. Di ko magawa to sa bahay ng tiyahin koh no. "I cannot," sagot ko "I live with my Aunt and her friend". Sabay syang "We can do this later if you want. What's your number?" Eh wala pa akong cellphone nun. Kaya sya na lang ang nagbigay ng number nya. Sinulat ko pa sa kaha ng yosi ko.

Bumaba ako two blocks away from the apartment for safety reason. "Shokran"... sabi koh habang baba sa kotse. (Shokran, Thank You.... ang unang Arabic word na natutunan koh).

Balik apartment na akoh. Nadoon na si Tita, nagluluto. "So, how was the interview?" tanong nya. Sagot ko..." Oh, it went very well.... kahit kinabahan ako." Sagot ng Tita, "You'll get used to it!" Sa isip koh: "Naman!"

To be continued.......

(Oh ayan AJ Sotteau. Happy ka na? Tse!)

And I Am Telling You.....

AKO. Maka regine. This is suppose to be just a comment on the Three Qs entry, but what can I say, I am empowered around here. And.... Bakla ako. Quever?

I love the comments...Hahahaha!

May Anak na si Harold

Leche! Ano na ba ang nangyayari sa world ngayon? Puro na lang kasinungalingan ang ganap. It makes me startle na ha. Si Ruffa, super sweet ulit ke Ylmaz kahit bugbug sya without the pasa; Si Lindsay Lohan di raw umiinom while driving, pero druga pala pwede; Papa Bush demonizing Iran (kunwari political tayo. Chos!); Pati ang Mama Oprah nabiktima (with A Million Little Pieces).

Anovah?! Pero eto ang hindi ko ma-take.

Si Harold me anak na!.... Gosh! I know di nyo kilala ang Harold (hindi true na name for confi). Kasama ko sya dati sa trabaho doon sa Middle East. Statuesque na bading na mukhang palaka. (Sorry talagah pero totoo). As in bading sya. Period. Ang proof: Niligawan ako at pinatikim ko rin naman sya ke Junior koh (pero never touch ko sya ha. Dala lang ng pagkalasing at super higa lang ang Lyka noon. Chos!). And of course, super kwento din sya about sa mga na-dyug nyang mga Arabo.

Rupert as a gay father in The Next Best Thing

Last Night, super browse ako sa Friendster koh. At surprised ang bading ng napindot ang account ng Harold na toh! Yeah, me asawa at anak na pala ang gagah! Anovah talagah? Na-aksidente ba at ala The Next Best Thing nina Rupert at Madonna ang drama? Or talagang biglang nag 180 degrees turn at nagpakita si Virgin Mary at nag-miracle kay Harold at naging tunay na lalaki bigla? Kaya message ang bruha kaagad ke Harold.

Hi Harold! Sup? I reckon you are a family man now. I am quite surprised with that. Man! I guess this is the hardest decision you've made, huh? Is this for real? What happened?

Ang natangap na reply:

"Hey Bro! (Wow! pa bro bro pa ang bruha!) Yes, you've known me as the 'old' Harold. But people change with time. I've changed... It was not a decision at all. It just happened.

Years after you left, I found out that i am into girls too and lost interest with men eventually..... ('WITH' raw, di ba 'IN' dafat?) I am happy of what life has brought me lately. I am glad being a husband and a father now. Chloe, my daughter (Siyet! Sa pangalan pa lang bading na ang tatay) brought me so much joy. You can still call me 'gay' though for I am happy and GAY with my wife and daughter. God Bless!" - Harold

PS. You should try those white girls over there. Who knows? You might like it too!

(Gosh Harold ha! Re: Your P.S.... Nasubukan ko na yan! Una lang ang tigas at ng nakita ko na ang peksman, nahimatay ang Junior koh! Siyet!)

-----O-----

Mga Bading, paki-explain. Anova ang nangyayari talagah? Kasinungalingan ba talaga ang Harold na toh or nagsasabi ng totoots? Bisexuality ("and lost interest with men eventually") ba talagah ito or Miraculo?

At least ang Ate Kelly ninyo, di iniwanan ang pagkabading. Kahit me asawa't anak na, bading pa rin. Walang kasinungalingan nakamit ang acheng Kelly dahil sya ay lantaran to everyone. Pati ang asawa, knowing.

Eh ang Harold? We respect his move pero (isang malaking)..... VAKIT?. Paano nangyari yun? Bigla na lang ba maglaho ang pagka-bading? Paki-explain!

-----O-----

FYI: Me permission po tayo ke Harold na i-publish ang sulat nya dito sa isang condition: Ibahin ang pangalan nya.

Tres Q's for the Queers

1) What is Your Favorite Madonna Song?

Rain, always come to mind. I dunno, probably because of the video. I so love it kasi... really. Kakainis ang vuhok ng Madz ditets. Ang tarush! The rhythm is so me. And yeah... those spoken words ending? "....And without a sound you'll appear and surrender to me, TO LOVE". Diva kakainis?

I asked Mama O naman kung ano sa kanya. This Used To Be My Playground raw. Asked naman ako kung why? Ang sagot: Naalala nya raw na ang palayan nilang pinaglalaruan nya ng bata sya..... Leche! Di ko alam na nostalgic ang bruha!



I dunno kina Ekra and Kelly. Di ko na ask. Sa dahilan nga na no words pa rin kami ng sister Ekra at ang Kelly naman ay di ma-contact sa phone nya. Feel ko yung ke Ekra ay Ray Of Light sa dahilan na mahilig ito sa Techno. At ang ke Kelly? Borderline... dahil nga borderline ang pagka-bading ng ate ninyo!

2) Imagine na famous Photographer ka and ang assignment mo: Ten Best Living Filipino Actresses in one Photo. Zino zino ang Pipiliin mo?

Yes! you have the freedom to choose sa ating mga bruhang best actresses. Lahat naka-gown na black, no smiling dafat. Puro matataray ang pose.... group picture ala Annie Leibovitz's Vanity Fair photo below.

Here is LTE's choice:
1. Nora Aunor (Naka Inno Sotto sya!)
2. Vilma Santos (Nakaupo at crossed ang legs dafat)
3. Gloria Romero (Dapat nasa gitna dahil sya ang pinaka matanda)
4. Sharon Cuneta (Nasa likod ni Gloria para hidden ang figure)
5. Maricel Soriano (Naka Rajo. Crossed ang arms).
6. Dina Bonnevie (Bongga nag make-up! At may long slit ang outfit)
7. Cherie Gil (Malditah look as usual, medyo naka-akbay ke Sharon)
8. Zsa Zsa Padilla (With pouting lips ha, katabi ni Dina)
9. Lorna Tolentino (Naka sideview at back to back sila ni Maricel)
10. Claudine Barreto (Nasa ground lang, nakahiga)

What? Wala si Hilda Koronel? Mga Ineng baka masira ang picture. Chos! Si Anita Linda kaya? Or si Beth Bautista? Si Jacklyn Jose naman ay sumakit ang ipin kaya si Claudine na lang ang pumalit. Ching!

3) Regine or Lea?

Mahirap to ha! Parang pinapipili ka kung zino ang i-dyug mo for one night between Jake Cuenca and Victor Basa. Chos! Si Lea Salonga siguro, sa dahilan na me Tony ang gagah! Pero sa biritan, ang Regine V. di magpapatalo. Maraming bading fans ang Regine ha at marami naring nahalikang Papa sa mga cheesy na pelikula nya. Sa pananamit? Wala sa dalawa! As in,... hello?

-------O------

Hay naketch. Cant wait sa mga comments nina Bitter Bitch, Goddess, at Oxana Olafski. Ang tatlong pinaka matataray sa barkadahang bading ng LTE. Tse!

Happy Birthday LTE!

(Anniversary Special)

This Day, Last Year.... LTE's first post, Mga Gaga Gaga hu! by Ekra Tan was published. August 12 2006 was when this blog officially started.

Ang tatlong badings (Ekra, Kelly, and Lyka) ay merong individual blogs dati. They were mainstream blogs nga lang.... personal blogs, in other words, pampamilya.

But this month of last year, they were influenced by their Fairy GodBloggers Charles Ravndal of The Queer Chef, Empress Maruja with her Random Lives, and the Life Funtastique by Jase, and decided having a group blog na rin to show their own malanding mataray bading sides. Ayun! Born Free na ang mga bading sa blog nilang LTE.

Why, Las Tres Estrellas? Si Ekra ang nagbigay ng pangalan dito. Dahil nga three kami, hiniram ang name ng sikat but cheap na retail store doon sa aming probinsya. Ang Las Tres Estrellas store ay tindahan ng mga damit ng mga ninang sa kasal.

This blog's original purpose was to share the ladies of Las Tres Estrellas own thoughts about everything bading and to know and grasp the minds of other Pinoy badings out there through their comments regarding any topic posted. Eventually, it turned out na anything goes na lang. Me tarayan, tuksuan at kabastusan. Characteristics na di mawawala sa ating mga backlash.

The first ever comment was made by Annabanana (Asan na kaya ang bruha ngayon? Nangibang channel na siguro. Vakit?... Sa dahilan na sya nga ang First Commenter ever, pero di naman na nominate for a Titi. Ching!).

Thanks to our sisters from the start na hanggang ngayon tuloy pa rin ang suporta. Salamat kina Charles Ravndal, Empress Maruja, Jase, Kiss My Mike, Goddess, Megan, and Bananas. Mula noon, Hanggang ngayon, at sana, Magpakailanman. Chos!

Then came Mama O. Ayaw magpa-iwan. Join rin ang bruha. Tatlong bading lang dapat pero dahil gusto rin ng Mama.... ginawang Las Tres Estrellas with Mama O na ang drama. 3 sisters and their loving mother kung baga.

The first other muning to feature us in her blog is no other than Jerome aka Bridget Jones. Hoy bruha! Miss ka na namin. Bat biglaan naman ang snub mo sa amin ha! Never ka ng bumalik ditets. Vakeeeet? Tse!..... That was the first ad we got outside this blog. Talaga tong si Bridget Jones, building bridges talagah.

Di lang mga ka-federasyon ang napadpad dito mula noon. We have our Girl-Friends too. Megan, Maui, Ate Sienna, Claire the Cat. Ang mga tunay na mujer na bading ang character. In other words, Mga Bading with Muning. Maheeeng!

At di rin exclusive for bloggers and may karapatan ditets but also those faceless, blogless bitches like Oxana Olafski (the first ever blogless bitch to win a Titi), Buritto, AJ S0autteu, ang mga bwisit na mga Anons, atbp.

We met different kind of badings and bading-lovers out there sa blog na to but the only beauty we met in person is no other than the Indian Mermaid aka Dyesebel Patel who now live with us in Mama O's house of the flying daggers. Aaaay! si Maui din pala. Kaibigan na sya ng Kelly dati pa pero naging friendship na rin ang LTE dahil sa blog na tosh.

Charles Ravndal knows Lyka before LTE pa through blogging din pero di pa sila nag-meet in person. Charles is also the one who designed the LTE template. Zalamat sa you, Chase! Di naging colorful ang blog na toh kung hindi dahil sa yo!

And to all of you who na bumibisita dito. Bading man or hindi. Pamhinta or Parlorista. Napadaan man or talagang sinadya. Nag-leave ng comment or di type. Zalamat.

Para sa inyo to:


At sa di na-mention. Dapat eksenadora kayo next time para naman ma-notice! Thank you na rin!

I feel a very unusual sensation - if it is not indigestion, I think it must be gratitude. ~Benjamin Disraeli

The Grand Titi

(Anniversary Special)

The Grand Titi Trophy presented by Nora

Yeeesss! We have completed the Titi Awards for the Year 2006-2007. Its time to award the Grand Titi to the most deserving Winner for this first year's LTE's Titi Awards.

But before that, please allow us to recount the History of the Titi.

The Titi was initiated the month the LTE Blog started. It was spearheaded by our very own beautiful sistah, Kelly. It was known before as the LTE's Choice Commenter Award. It was officially renamed as the Titi on October 2006 when we started to give away the Flying Titi Trophies.

The first Titi recipient is Jase for her short and precise comment on Jen Rosendhal's sexy picture (Mga Papaya ni Jen). The Comment? "Aaaay! Jokla!". That was the shortest comment ever to win a Titi, nevertheless, the first.

Most of you were nominated to win a Titi but only 9 beautiful ladies happened to grab one (or two) and call it their own. Only three ladies have won Two Titi. They are Jase, Bananas, and Mandaya Moore-Orlis. . The first ever to hold a Titi Trophy is our October Winner Goddess. The first two trophies given were not the flying trophies like we have now. They were silver coated figurine of a man standing straight imaging the Oscars Trophy (boring).

The most nominated beauty is no other than Bananas with 12 and the most nominated without winning is Maui with 8. The most successful we say with regards to ratio comparison is IE with 2 noms and 1 win.

-------O-------

Well, now let us present to you The Grand Titi Winner! She is the most nominated and has the most win for the LTE year 2006-2007 of the Titi. Nora ihanda na ang Grand Titi Trophy please.

Ladies, and kabadingan world, Our Grand Titi Winner is.......... Bananas!!!!!!!

Bananas garnered 12 nominations and won two Titis. She is truly deserving! Congratulations Bananas!!! May you enjoy your Grand Titi day and night, especially during lonely nights! Ching!

Here is Bananas and her court:

Titi Grand Winner: Bananas
First Princess: Mandaya Moore-Orlis
Second Princess: Jase
Third Princess: Empress Maruja
Fourth Princess: Goddess

-------O------

Sa mga nagproprotesta, punta kayo ng Mendiola o Plaza Miranda!! - Goddess

If you want to see how well you did, here is our LTE Awards Summary:

Winners:
Bananas: 12 nominations, 2 Wins (March 2007, September 2006)
Mandaya Moore: 9 nominations, 2 Wins (June 2007, November 2006)
Jase: 7 nominations, 2 Wins (December 2006, August 2006)
Empress Maruja: 9 nominations, 1 Win (May 2007)
Goddess: 7 nominations, 1 Win (October 2006)
Megan: 5 nominations, 1 Win (February 2007)
Oxana Olafski: 5 nominations, 1 win (July 2007)
Bitter Bitch: 4 nominations, 1 Win (January 2007)
IE: 2 Nominations, 1 Win (April 2007)

Most Nominated:
1. Bananas (12)
2. Empress Maruja (9)
2. Mandaya Moore (9)
4. Maui (8)
5. Jase (7)
5. Goddess (7)
7. Bryan Anthony (6)
8. Megan (5)
8. Charles Ravndal (5)
8. Kiks (5)
8. Oxana Olafski (5)

4 Noms: (Bridget Jones, Pat, Bitter Bitch)
3 Noms: (Ate Sienna, Gayzha, The Aceist, Johnny Panic)
2 Noms: (IE, JC Guiyab)
1 Nom: (Kiss My Mike, BitchyMickeyMike, Brown Cow, Fabulously EB, Yaku, Oboids, Flash Lightbringer, Carlo Magno, Thysz Estrada, Mrs. J, Aries, Bakla sa Banga, Frankie, Mink Twink, Bubbles Devere)

------O-----

God Bless You All! Charoooots!

Bagong Crush

We know,..... late na kami. Pero, true! Super infatuated kami ni Mama O ke Jake Cuenca na to lately. Ewan kung bakit di namin pansin sya dati. At ngayon super kilig ang mga gagah! Dahil ba sa bagong vuhok nya?

Pasensya na. Matagal na palang artista to sa tin. Remember raw ni Mama O na sya yung kapatid ng Gerald Anderson sa teleserye nila ni Kim Chiu. Remember ko rin last year pag-uwi ko sya rin ata ang model na nasa mga Magazines na nababasa koh.

Natutulog ba ang Diyos Marathon ang drama namin kanina. Saan pa kundi sa YouTube. (Wala nga kaming TFC). Leche ang cute nya! Infernalou veloso, mahusay umarte ang Jake. Kahit hindi sila bagay ng Roxanne Guinoo, watch pa rin kami. Hindi dahil maganda ang storyline (predictable nga eh), kundi dahil lang ke Papa Jake. Ang cute! Bwisit!

May kinabukasan ang Papang toh! Sure na!

LTE History: How We Met

Sa dahilan na Anniversary Month ng LTE ngayon, eto ang kwento ng aming sisterhood. How we met at kung papaano na-connect ang apat na mga bading ng LTE.

Circa Early 80's:
Grade 2 ako noon. Bading na po. I remember crush ko ang neighbor naming basketbolero. Palaging naka shorts na super iksi. Inaabangan ko whenever nakikigamit ng telepono sa bahay. Yes po, kami lang ata ang may PLDT line noon sa barangay namin. Habang nagtetelebabad ang crush koh, super walis naman kunwari ang drama ko sa background. Gagah ko ano?

Sa school naman, obvious na obvious ako. Yellow kasi ang bag ko. One day, introduction of new classmates raw from our teacher. 3 months after nag-start ang class, new classmates na naman? Vakit? Me na-promote raw from grade 1 to grade 2. Dalawa. At isa si Ekra dito. Ang taray ng Ekra. Matalino. Sikat sa klase. Tse!

Naging friends na kami ni Ekra since then. Tawagan sa phone ever. (Opo, meron ding PLDT line sina Ekra, me party line nga lang. Chos!). Pero walang kabadingan of course. Puro school work and extra curricular ang mga chika namin noon.

Circa Late 80's:
High School. Nagkahiwalay na kami ni Ekra. Lumipat ako ng school. Iba na ang mga kaibigan koh pero tawagan pa rin kami ni Ekra paminsan minsan. Off topic pa rin ang kabadingan. Super pressured ako noon sa High School namin. Nandoon kasi ang sisterette kong tunay. Me pagka-sikat naman ang bruha doon kaya medyo behave talaga ako. Ayaw ng sister na pabading bading ako. Kaya ang kinalabasan ng Lyka...... Paminta! (na super dala hanggang ngayon).

Ekra stayed in the same school where we finished Grade School. Doon nya nakilala ang Kelly. Friendship sila pero di ko pa kilala si Kelly that time. Super taray at ingay raw tong si Kelly noon. Balita ko, kasama sila na pasaway noon. Off topic pa rin ang kabadingan kahit alam na ng isa't isa ang tunay napagkatao nila.

Circa Early 90's
College: Ang Ekra super fly sa Manila at doon nag-aral sa UP Diliman. Tse! Ako naman ay pa-sweet. Nursing ang kinuha. Bumalik sa former school ko para mag-BSN. At ang Kelly? Classmate koh! Di ko alam na friendship sila ng Ekra sa High School. Dahil nga same high school sila ng Ekra, asked ko ang bagong classmate koh kung kilala ang Ekra. As in super Gloria Diaz smile kaagad ang Kelly. Mula noon, friendship na kami.

First week sa College. Meron kaming classmate na tahimik lang sa gilid. Mukhang probinsyano. Mukhang taga Barrio. One time, meron kaming payment due sa school. Di ko po alam yun! Kaya no bring bread ketch. Due na pala that day. Siyet! Ang Kelly, tama lang pera. Bwiset! Nakita ko ang probinsyanong classmate ko na nasa tabi ko at ask ako kung pwede munang makahiram ng pera at bayaran ko na lang the next day. Ok naman sa kanya. Solved ang problema.

The next day, payment time na. Hinanap ang probinsyanong classmate at binayaran. Super friendly ang Lyka. Super tanong ng name at personal stuff tungkol sa new classmate. Hanggang sa birthday napunta ang usapan. Gosh! Pareho ang birthday namin! Parehong year. Wow! Kakaiba. Mula noon, friendship na kami. Friendship na kami ni Mama O.... at of course ni Kelly. Tatlong mga bading patago sa College. Opo, walang kabadingan pa rin.

Until ng nagka-BF ako nung Fourth Year. Super out of the closet na akoh sa mga friendship koh. Ke Mama O at Kelly. Hanggang sila na rin nag out of the closet sa kin.

At this time, ang Ekra, super rampa rin pala sa Manila. Di namin alam toh dahil di pa sya open noon whenever umiwa sya sa aming province. Dahil nga friendship nya ako ng grade school at friendship nya rin ang Kelly ng High School. Sabay sa barkada every summer ang bruha. Boracay Escapades palagai ang aming drama noon. Hanggang naging-close to you na rin sila ng Mama O.

Circa 2000's:
Hanggang sa Amerika, friendship pa rin kami nina Mama O at Ekra. Di na mukhang prbinsyana ang Mama O. Sya na ang pinaka fashionable sa amin. Kami na ang mukhang probinsyano whenever kasabay ang bru. Si Ekra kumuha na rin ng Nursing at nakapagtapos dito. Ang Kelly? Naiwan sa Pinas. Nangiba ng course. May BSN nga sya kaya lang ayaw nya raw magpunas ng pwet ng ibang tao kaya ayun, Manager ng Hotel ang drama. Pero lately, gusto na ring pumunta dito. Kaya wait pa rin kaming tatlo para completo na ang LTE Sisterhood.

Yan po ang History namin.

-----O------

Boring ano? Kakainis na post toh. Pasayahin nga natin. Hidden are some link pics of the LTE ladies in their natural state, minus Ekra. (Baka magalit eh. Di pa naman kami sa mabuting kalagayan ngayon). Hanapin nyo nga sa buong post above ang mga hidden pics na toh! Ito'y mga pics namin nina Mama O at Kelly. 15 silang lahat. Describe sa comment section kung anong pic ang nakita nyo. Ang may maraming nakikita, Panalo! Good luck!

Speeches 'N Creme

(Suggestion lang po ni Mandaya. Pagbigyan natin ang bruha!)

Here are our Titi Winners for 2006-2007 LTE Year and their words upon receiving their very own Titi.

(August 2006 Titi Winner) Jase:
Eeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiii.... Ohhh my Gashhh (sabay cover ng hands sa fez!) Naka Pitoy Moreno ba aketch? (Sabay Miss U kaway sa crowds... walking to the stage) .....To the fabulous Las Tres Estrellas, especially to Tita Lyka who without pride and prejudice nominated and selected me for this first time eveeer Ms Choice Commenter Award.... Thank you from the bottomless pit of my heart... greatly appreciated mga manesh!...... And to those who did not make it for the month of August - there are still months September to December - so you can choose which month you want, mga bruh! ...... I am just donating the proceeds of this award, whatever it is, to the victims of the Mayon Volcano and the street children in the Bading province in Mindanao........ What a great idea! Julaming zalamat fohhh! Mavuuu for the Las Tres Estrellas!!!

(September 2006 Titi Winner) Bananas:
Anuvah! Di ko ineexpect ito. Wala lang man akong clue na--ako na pala teh!.... Sorry sa late speech na ito. Nag-lamyerda kasi ako sa Island Garden of Samal at nakipagpatentero sa mga islanders..... Unang una, salamat sa Las Estrellas. Pangalawa, wala na akong dapat pang pasalamat kundi ang sarili ko! Ahahaha... Ang ganda ko talaga. Ang award na ito ay para sa sarili ko... yon lang!...... Sa lahat ng mga pumuri at nagtiwala...dapat lang!..... Sa lahat ng ayaw tanggapin ang pagkapanalo--hindi ako magsosorry. Maglaway kayo!!!.... To Athan, I laps you... muwah. Ako na teh!

(October 2006 Titi Winner) Goddess:
Sa lahat talaga ng award giving body, wa-ing nagsasabi na na-loss sila.. puro dinaya! Ching..!! Salamat sa award mga mujer..!! .....Sa mga nagproprotesta, punta kayo ng Mendiola o Plaza Miranda!! Chos..!! Yngatz mga bakla..!!

(November 2006 Titi Winner) Mandaya Moore:
Salamat! Salamat! Hindi ko ito in-expect. Hindi ko rin in-expect na isa-isang malalagas ang mga dahon sa alogbati gown ko. I would like to thank my father, my mother and most especially my parents. Sa mga bakla sa aking bukid- salamat. Sa aking boyfriend na si Kulot, para sa iyo ang award na ito. Sa organizers ng parangal na ito-- hindi ko ito makakalimutan...... And in the tradition of political speeches sa mga events na tulad nito, ito lang ang masasabi ko: Imperialismo, Ibagsak! (Nagmamadaling bumaba ng stage at patakbong umalis. Sabi kasi ni Kulot, pwede pa naming ibenta ang alogbati sa palengke. Sayang din daw ang konting kikitain.)

(December 2006 Titi Winner) Jase:
OMG!!!! Just arrived today from my ten days holidaze, and I am yet dazed and now dizzy to know I won again for the month!!! I guess my comment was just sooo true :) Ching! Thanks gurls, this has become a very important award for queens, bitches and the trying hard ones ... Anyway, i don't feel like being a bitch today and so I beso beso all of you and wish you all a HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! May we all get what we deserve this year!

(January 2007 Titi Winner) Bitter Bitch:
Wahahaha! Wut can i say!.... Hmmm... thanx to the pipol who voted and to LTE... hahaha! Dont get me wrong... masaya ako sa award at thankful... Pero sa buhay? Hanggang may mga taong nakukuha ang gusto nila at ako hindi, hindi ako buong-pusong sasaya!.... Salamat sa LTE at eto lang ang masasabi ko... more to come from Bitterbitch... This is not the end of my bitter comments... At para sa mga taong masasaya... humanda kayo! ako ang magiging malaking tinik sa mga lalamunan niyo! Hahaha!

(February 2007 Titi Winner) Megan:
Homaygad. Homaygad. Homaygad. Maraming, maraming salamat sa pagboto sa isang abang katulad ko! Chos! ..... Shet, ang galing nyo naman, favorite ko ang song na yan!!! Evar! (Referring to the Song of the Week Take a Picture by Filter which was dedicated to her)..... Teka nga, makahiram nga ng isang Balenciaga kay Mudra Greta... Kakalokah!!!

(March 2007 Titi Winner) Bananas:
Hay! Pasensya na po kayo at hindi po ako nakapag-prepare ng speech. (dudukot ng papel mula sa dibdib)..... Unang una po ay gusto ko pong pasalamatan ang mga taong walang sawa po ang pagsuporta sa akin. Sa Aking pamilya na hindi ko po alam kung nasaan ngayon. Sa aking mga kaibigan na tiyak ko pong magkakandarapa na naman sa pagpapasipsip sa akin samantalagang kahapon ay nilait-lait po nila ako...... Kay Father Vince po of the Blessed Burning Bush Chapel sa Patikul, Sulu... maraming salamat father sa mga mga dasal na inalay nyo po para sa aking sala... sa aking sala... at sa aking pinakamalaking sala..... (Salamat) kay Claudine, Gretch, at Marj. Kay Ruffa, grabe, at sa kanyang lips. Kay Dawn sa kanyang mga saging at pinya na may lason...... Syempre di ko po dapat na kalimutan si Justice Sec. Gonza. Kay Dating Justice Sec. Nanny. Kay GMA po... kapuso ko po yan at kasukasuan...... Kay...sino pa ba? Baka po may makalimutan ako... kay Miguel Z--apir daw kayo ni Vina. Kay Mike Defensor po at sa kanyang braces. Kay Ralph at at Bee..... Sa Comelec po at sa nalalapit na namang fiesta ng dagdag-bawas. Sa lahat po ng mga na TUTA, mabuhay po kayo. Yon...Thank you...salamat po. Mabuhay po tayong lahat. Ay!!! Hello po pala kay Garci. Hello!

(April 2007 Titi Winner) IE
Wow. Gosh, ngayon ko lang nakita ito. Grabe, nakaka-flatter naman ito. *blush* I would like to thank, first of all, God, without whom none of this would've been possible. he he. And thanks also to the fabulous four that is mama o, lyka, ekra, and kelly. (Pause)...... Pasensya, feel na feel ko ang moment. Salamat din sa lahat ng bloggers na bumoto para sa akin... Mahal ko kayong lahat! Mabuhay ang kabadingan!

(May 2007 Titi Winner) Empress Maruja:
Oh my God! Thank you sa inyo! (brings out a list) Thank you first and foremost to Las Tres Estrellas for the Titi. Finally mahahawakan ko na ito't mahahaplusan habang nilalagyan ng polish. Thank you to all who voted. I really wasn't expected to win. Being nominated is already a joy for me, but giving me this award is more than enough. To my co-nominees, huwag malungkot. May next month naman.

(June 2007 Titi Winner) Mandaya Moore-Orlis:
This is the oddest acceptance speech made by a winner in our entire Titi Awards history. This is what happened.

Ms Mandaya Moore-Orlis cannot go up the stage. Her gown is not made of stretchable material. Baka mapunit daw. MC walks down to where Ms Mandy sits..... MC to Mandy: "You look so sexy in that gown." Mandy: "Thank You. I designed it." MC: "You will look even sexier without it." Kulot: "Walang kang respeto sa babae!" (Sabay suntok sa MC) Mandy: "Please, wag kayong mag-away! Huwag nyo akong pag-agawan!" (with tears in her eyes). Kulot: "Binabastos ka nya!" Mandy: "Nakita lang nya ang nakita mo sa akin." (Kulot embraces Mandy. Mandy embraces back. Mandy grabs microphone from MC) Mandy: "I have no words. Thank You."

(July 2007 Titi Winner) Oxana Olafski:
Oh my God. Oh my God. I'm sorry. I can't believe this. I feel so cold. I'm shaking. This Titi is real! I'm so honored. I'm so honored. I would like to thank Las Tres Estrellas from the bottom of my heart. Thank you. Thank you for nominating me alongside past winners, Bananas and Bitterbitch. I don't feel very deserving of this in their presence. This moment is so big, this is for every faceless and blogless bitch that now has a chance because this door tonight has been opened. Thank you..... I wouldn't be up here, if it wasn't for my family. Mom and dad, Mr. and Mrs. Olafski, (tears start flowing) I love you more than anything, and Felina and Josef for making me feel as your most beautiful sister in the world. I love you guys. (Sobbing)....... JP, the love of my life. Thank you for being my shield, protecting me when I most needed it; for being my cape, allowing me to fly high and fulfill my dreams like Wonder Woman. (Wailing)...... Octavio, I know you're watching, thank you for being there for me when I needed a companion for a good conversation or a shoulder to cry on. I freakin miss you. Take a leave and visit me here. (Laughing and sobbing)...... I wanna thank my wonderful friends, you know who you are, thank you......Donatella, thank you for making me the most glamorous girl tonight and to my jeweler which I forgot the name, sorry, thank you very much..... My lawyer, surgeon, stylists, hairdressers, my devoted servants, thank you. Thank you......To my fellow nominees, to the gorgeous ladies who voted for me, Mandaya, Jase, Chase, Kiks, Brown Cow, Yajnat, AJ Sotteau-Ingebrigsten, Thank you very much...... Lyka, I've finally earned a place among Titi legends. I will keep this with my most treasured possessions. Thank you..... To all the people around the world who continue on caring and protecting our natural environment, I dedicate this award to you. Thank you very much....... Finally, to the Heavenly Father who gave us life, a beautiful Earth, and everything, words are not enough to express our gratitude..... No, don't you play that wrap up music at me. I may never be up here again.......Sa lahat ng nakalimutan kong pasamalatan, sorry nagpapatunay lamang na hindi kayo dapat pasalamatan dahil nakalimutan ko kayo. Ching!..... And oh by the way, Yaya, I need my Titi award delivered to my hotel suite. Leave the Titi in the foyer. Don't forget to pick up my dry cleaning. That's all....... Fellomhin and women, now's our time to save the world. I love you all!...... Ah, I see my time is up. Here is the hot David Beckham to escort me into the wings....... For green peace! Gracias!

-----O-----

There you go mga Bru! Who gave the best acceptance speech ba sa inyo? Again Congratis sa ating mga Titi Holders! Ingatan dapat ito. Dont use it all the time ha. Dapat sa mga special occasions lang gagamitin toh! Tse!

(Eto na ata ang pinakamahabang Titi.... este, post ng LTE. Vavoooo!)

Titi Winner: July 2007

Ladies, welcome to our 12th and last Titi Awards Night for the year 2006-2007. It is good to see all of you here again. Past Titi Awardees, past nominees, Papas, friends, and mere spectators joining us here tonight, Thank you for cumming!

Here are some Red Carpet highlights:

1. We love Double Titi Winner, Jase's vintage gold pleated chiffon with a sweetheart neckline by Balenciaga. Nag-mukha syang Valenciana.
2. Did you see the glittering necklace Bitter Bitch is wearing? Its Bvlgari raw! Bvlgari Lising!
3. The best accessory of the night is from our May 2007 Winner, Empress Maruja: yung escort nya from Los Angeles, Pampanga. We heard, expensive raw yun!
4. We cant get over with, our 9-time nominee and a nominee again tonight, Maui's bold display of fashion sense: Pairing an embellished tiered skirt by Armani Castaneda with a plain white Crispa shirt. Sharon Stone-inspired raw! Tse!
5. And last Month's Titi Winner Mandaya Moore-Orlis' see-through gown made of recycled Nature Spring plastic bottles by Napoleon Abueva. Nakita nyo ang Kagubatan nya? Nag ala Karla Bautista ang gagah! Yun ang essence ng ating mahal na si Mandaya. Bringing the gubat to the city.

Its truly a bright and shining night, tonight! Everybody is a star. But a new queen must arise! Our new Titi Winner (Best Commenter) for July 2007 is................

Congratulations Oxana Olafski! Ayan! Kahit ang dethroned Miss U Oxana Federova ang ginamit mo for your publicity photo, win ka! Hindi dahil sa gown or buhok man, ito'y dahil sa environmental advocacy chu-chu mo at naging winnie the pooh kah! Tse!

Here is Oxana's comment that made here a Titi Winner:

(On Porn Star Francois Sagat's pic here): "That's an example of a small practical step to address climate change. I'm hoping that mr. sagat's smoke test will become part of the warrant of fitness in an effort to reduce vehicle emissions and clean up air quality. Gracias!"

At may pahabol pa....

"Omg. Thank you thank you for considering my environment-friendly comment. Ladies, it's time for us to take our responsibility as gorgeous custodians of a gift that belongs to all people. In our effort to love and respect Mother Earth, let us teach our countrymen, more importantly our children, to stop throwing used condoms on our neighbor's backyard. Gracias!"


Diva Bongga? Pinatunayang deserving sya! Again, Congratulations Bruha!

-----O-----

In case you're wondering....
July's First Princess is: Bitter Bitch
Second Princess is: Johnny Panic
LTE Choice Award: Oxana Olafski

-----O-----

Song of the Week: Dedicated to our new winner, Miss Oxana Olafski. It is Autumn Tactics by Chicane. Listen and watch sa sidebar. ----->

Mercedes Bench!

Be Bench Model Search Top 12 Finalists:

Mga Mhin:

Clockwise From Top Left: John, Carlo, Joey, Ron, Martin and Kerbie

Mga Muning:


Clockwise from Top Left: Kristine, Michelle, Regine, Precious, Rachel, and Kaye

Betsina Ramos ng LTE
Carlo Guevarra of Pasay:
May potential ang boyette na toh. Pwedeng i-develop. Twink na Twink ang datets. Yan ang hinahanap ng Benchan. Feel koh!

Michelle Carbonell of Davao: Dahil magkamukha kami. Chos! In na In pa naman ang mga mata nito. (Ang mga mata namin). Win si Kim Chiu. Win si Beatriz Saw. I am sure win din ang tsinitang ito.

Ay Ewan. Always mali naman ang mga Betsina Ramos namin. Sana ngayon tatama na. Tse! Watch the Top 12 Be Bench chu-chu video (with Papa Piolo and Tita Kris) here. Vavooo!