Lyka Bergen and her Step-Sisters

Tears! Opinion! Shame!

2012-01-19T06:00:00.000-08:00

Our Five Favorite People this week:

TEARS: Two of them are shedding out tears...

1. OCTAVIA SPENCER: The Golden Globe winner in the W Magazine January 2012 Issue is shedding tears... pero tears of joy ito, mga Becks. We are happy for her winning the Globe. Let her have the Oscar as well. Pls lang! Deserving ang Lola! She stole our hearts in The Help and brought us the "Eat my shit" churva. (And wait, kamukha sya ni Eugene Domingo. Di ba?)

2. CHARLENE ALMARVEZ: We thought the Las Tres Estrellas of Pin0y Modelling (Charo, Charlene, and Danica) are already past recollection in the international scene ha until we see this editorial of Charlene in UK's Fiasco Magazine (January 2012 Issue). Emotera ang drama. May tulo luha effect. Di magpapatalo kay Octavia. Ching. Hoping to see more of the three this year. In the name of Darna!

A Matter Of OPINION:

3. JULIUS BABAO (in Bandila): Thank you for putting the lid on those Pinoys who hated fellow Pinoys for being Uzi in The Bourne Legacy film shoot in Manila. We agree with you, Julius. So what if they're being Uzi. It is not us who will adjust to them (the foreign filmmakers and actors) ... it's for them to get accustomed to who we are (for being Uzi for example). They are in a foreign country, hello? When in Paris, do as the Parisians do. Sadly, kasi sometimes, sinasanto na natin ang mga puting dayuhan na toh. So please stop na this. Salamat Julius, and pakita mo naman ang upper teeth mo. Please!

4. COCO MARTIN (in KrisTV): Oh yeah, the Indie to Mainstream Actor has a point. Speaking his mind about Philippine Cinema, where good quality Pinoy films raw are not noticed unless they are seen as admirable by foreigners. This, in front of all people, Kris Aquino ha. Natameme ang lola nyo. What does she know about good quality films anyways. Eat my shit! Chos lang. Mama O and I love Kris for being candid. Her opinion doesnt matter but.... its fun lang talaga! Promise!

SHAME!

5. MICHAEL FASSBENDER: He should have won the award! Shame on you Globe! Seeing his craft for the first time in Shame, we thought he'll be the one to beat. But they gave it to the more popular one, George. Tse! This guy is the new Viggo Mortensen or the future Daniel Day Lewis. One of the best Actors of his generation. Magaling. And mind you, daku sya (check nyo sa Shame). Naglalaway si Ekra habang lumalamon ng Popcorn. Chos! If we still have the Titi Award, we'll definetely give it to him, in a literal way. We still have to see him in, Hunger. Cause, we are hungry for more! Amen!

Time To Shut Up!

2012-01-13T03:51:00.000-08:00

Sometimes it's better not to share anything of what you think anymore. A time to keep things to yourself and say nothing about it. A time when to voice out your thoughts is no longer important. Of what you desire is better be kept to yourself. Sharing of what you love (or hate), is sometimes, to most, insignificant. So why do it? ..... Better shut up then! (Unless they'll ask you for it).

We are all different people anyway. Each has his own conclusion. Who cares if you think Michael Fassbender should win the Best Actor and how 'big" you think he was in 'Shame'? Who gives a damn if you worship this cute guy Paolo Avelino or how much you hate Charice Pempengco? Who gives a hoot if you dream to go to Amanpulo or how you thought it's a must to go to Kathmandu? Why do we have to broadcast it to all? Its trivial to most..... so why say or write it?

EXCEPT if you are a celebrity or a politico or a living santo.... Yeah, unless you are Ms Chuvaness or a Paulo Coelho or maybe, Ms Kris Aquino.

On the 13th day of the new year, I made my resolution. I'll keep my thoughts to myself from now on, unless people ask me to spill it. But wait! Who cares about my resolution anyway? Wiz! So there, in 13 seconds, I just broke my resolution. Tse! .. Arteeee! Pls lang!

I Always Wanted To Be A Model...

2011-11-04T00:00:00.000-07:00

Jade Or Juste?

2011-09-28T02:07:00.000-07:00

Congratulations to Jade for winning Britain and Ireland's Next top model

But our hearts were for Juste.

Somehow Elle, et al were looking for someone who looks different.

The freckles nailed it.

But she looks unforgivably awful here.

So, that makes Juste our own true winner. Pls lang!

The Youngest Project Runway Fan

2011-09-16T20:14:00.000-07:00

Kaloka ang batang ito.

Bringing Back The Anna Bayle Walk

2011-09-10T04:33:00.000-07:00

Gosh ha! Shamcey's distinct walk in the Miss U Preliminary made her one of our top favorites. From number 14 in our previous Favorite list, she jumps really high to somewhere in the Top 5 after watching the preliminaries.

That walk, now known sa kabaklaan world as the 'Tsunami Walk' is actually not original. We thought, It's the modern version of the Anna Bayle's Walk! Thanks Shamcey for bringing the Walk back! Taray!

See Shamcey's Modern Version:

and The 80's Anna Bayle's Walk:

Diva Taray? Pls lang!

LTE's Favorites: Ms. Universe 2011

2011-09-05T02:53:00.000-07:00

Next week, the new Ms Universe will be crowned. Ready na ba ang mga bading? I know you have your own Top 15 list. Here's ours. This is not a prediction, but our list of favorites. After browsing Global Beauties site, Missosology, and The official Miss Universe website, we have come up with our own Top beauties. In order of Lyka-bility.

TOP 15:

TOP 10:

TOP 5:

Yes! Congratulations GREECE for winning LTE's Choice for Ms Universe 2011. We wish you and the rest of our Top 15 all the luck this coming Monday.

(We're not sure about Supsup. She's included in our TOP 15 List not only because of the Sash factor.We do believe she has something. We hope she'll do good. She's carrying the name of our country, for Zombading sake! Please lang!)

Lovin' Lovi

2011-09-02T00:24:00.001-07:00

Why dont The Philippines send this girl (or her calibre) to Ms. U?

If Lovi be our delegate, I will be rapturously blissed out! Only one question though: Is she tall enough? I hope so! Pls lang! I bet her stature is the best formula for a long awaited modern Filipina Win in Ms U. Tse nilang lahat!

LTE's Top 5 Fadil's Portraits 2011

2011-08-30T03:37:00.001-07:00

Fadil Barisha's Photos for Miss Universe 2011 are out. Who did well? And who fell flat? Here's our Top 5 Best Fadil Portraits 2011:

1. ALBANIA (Taray!)

2. CROATIA (Parang wala lang pose!)

3. GREECE (Subtle pero bongga!)

4. JAPAN (Fierce kung fierce!)

5. SWITZERLAND (Natural ang dating ng gaga!)

And how about our very own The PHILIPPINES?

I dunno. Parang gusto ko na parang hinde. Parang may mali. Ewan ko talaga. Di ko alam kung ano. Kayo na lang ang humusga. Pls lang!

Ekra Tan @ SF Fashion Week

2011-08-17T18:48:00.000-07:00

From Project Runway-LTE to San Francisco Fashion Week. Congratulations to our esteemed sister Ms. Ekra Tan for her successful show! WTG bruha! We are proud of you. Ibang level ka na talaga! Tse!

Can't wait for the next one. Philippine Fashion Week? Sana ma-approve ni Mr. Joey Espino. Charing! Ang masasabi ko lang.... Go for Gold, Marigold!

[All photos by Mark Stephan.]

California English

2011-08-09T00:44:00.000-07:00

My place of work is such a diverse atmosphere. Fellow nurses are Chinese, Guatemalan, and one from Nepal. Oh and that new traveller nurse with a nice curly hair from Haiti. Some are white (yeah whites from Ireland, Germany, and Russia). A Nurse Assistant is from Sudan and another from Cambodia. Doctors are mostly Asian Indians (but there is this cute one, an Intern from Lebanon). I recently chatted with a guy from the blood bank who is from Yemen and didnt forget my "Salam Alaikom". And you deal with a unit clerk that is from Nigeria with that very strong accent, bongga!

One of the Nurse Supervisors is from Syria, and her assistant, a South Korean gay guy who dresses well. We also love this very diligent housekeeper from Mexico. And her compatriot, the one who makes hamburgers at the cafeteria. But hated this phlebotomist from Cuba. And our scheduler is a cute Portuguese guy (whom I dreamt once doing me). Tse!

We are from everywhere and the whole hospital is comparable to the United Nations already (or a Miss Universe Pageant? Chos!). And yeah, I haven't mentioned of the patients yet. We are assigned to 4-5 patients per shift. Just last week, my patients list is consisted of 4 different ethnicity: A woman from France, an African-American guy, A nice old lady from Ecuador who doesnt speak English (pinahirapan ba naman ako), and yes... an ornery Filipino lola. (Kaloka sya dhay!)

Out of work, is no different. I go to a Vietnamese mechanic for an on and off car trouble. My hairdresser is Japanese. Mama O's gym trainer is Peruvian (yummy! Ching!) Plus his booty call is from the UK. (malandi ang tita nyo! Aristocratic ang accent!) Also had a nice conversation with a Thai waitress yesterday about their new female Prime Minister while waiting for my to-go Pad-See-Ew. And the cashier from the grocery I go to has a strong Eastern European accent. (Her nameplate screams... IRINA!)

If New York City is the most multi-cultural city, California is the most diversified State. San Francisco alone is such a mixed nuts. Dont worry if you have an accent, we dont mind. That is what we call.... California English.

We are different people in the same boat. We all came here as people with multiple nationalities and ended having ONE, we all became Americans. Sweet!

Fashion Pedophilia?

2011-08-06T02:03:00.001-07:00

French Vogue features a 10 year old child as a grown woman in one of their January fashion editorials. With muk-ups and heels ha! Taray or Aray?

This thought-provoking controversial chu-chu is too much to some but Art to others. Was the child exploited to attain high artistry? Are the Make up and stiletto Heels age-appropriate? Are the poses too suggestive? Maybe not as the way i look at it. Perhaps to some it does matter. Or baka kung batang lalaki yan, ewan ko lang! Chos!

Her name is Thylane Blondeau. She'll grow up to be the next Kate Moss.

Fashion is such a queer form of art. Its affection to kooky facts makes it bizarre. The more unconventional it is, the more it is talked about. Not so long ago, Fashion Bestiality, with its love for animals, (Fur, et al) was loathed by some but adored by others. And now comes Fashion Pedophilia. What's your take?

The Iron Lady and The Moon

2011-07-08T00:44:00.000-07:00

One thing about Meryl Streep's movies is the urge and excitement to watch every single one, not because of its interesting story line or concept but all because of her extra-ordinary captivating portrayal. Trailer pa lang. Mapapa-wow ka na.

Bongga diva?

----O----

Forgive me, but I am bit of a music-catcher. Any music I hear that tickles my senses, I google and listen all over and over. Thanks to Shazam by the way, they make it easier for me to discover cool music just like this one from The Iron Lady's trailer: Clint Mansell's Welcome To Lunar Industries from the movie MOON's OST:

Ka-churvahan lang, pero venga for me!

-----O----

Anyone seen MOON yet? An example of a film that I've watched without knowing anything about, yet giving me a sense of an idea of how a movie should be. One of those exceptional films that will make you think. A relief from those forgettable superhero science fiction entertainment. Watch nyo lang. Bongga sya. Promise!

Love Reflex

2011-06-22T14:11:00.000-07:00

"Mahal mo ba ako dahil kailangan mo ako or Kailangan mo ako dahil mahal mo ako?"

Was that Claudine's remarks in that forgettable movie? How beautiful naman the matter. It is so me at this point. So I ask the doubt myself.

Mr Mahal Kita Dahil Kailangan Kita:

He's so persistent. He will always say he loves me but it doesnt stop there. After the "I Love You's" there is this "I need help". The help he's asking is more of the financial side. And that is so no-no talaga sa isang relationship for me ha. Once/Twice and if in dire is fine with me, but... Often? So chaka and so palpak. I hate it. So bye bye mister. I dont need this kind of love.

Mr Kailangan Kita Dahil Mahal Kita:

So came this guy. Nice looking. Professional. And doesnt need to ask me some financial favors. I thought this might be it. But this one is so clingy ha. He needs me because he loves me. He needs me to see/call him everyday. To chat with him everyday. He needs his 'good mornings' and 'good nights' from me.... and mind you, that's all his asking raw ha. And to think, di pa kami officially mag jowa nyan ha. He gets mad if i dont act like the way he does (like being sweet to the point na lalangamin ka na). As if, im the only person that gives him life talaga. Well, that is so OA for me ha. and I dont do that. So i took a break and never came back.

----O----

A friend would ask: "Bakit wala ka pang BF? Maarte ka kasi!". Call me maarte pero di ko talaga ma take. Well, there are this kind of Pinoy Baklas that "Provides for Love". Im not one of them. And there are those who "Over-acts when in love". Hinde rin ako dyan na belong.

Im just a bakla looking for a Love Reflex. A spontaneous display of affection. Unforced. Extemporaneous. Unstudied. Walang effort. Mentioning this, i dont wanna look for it. It will just come uninhibited. Maybe, that is why i dont have someone at this point. Is my Love process too complicated? Pls lang!

Is Aljur The Next Piolo?

2011-06-08T18:03:00.000-07:00

Is Aljur the Next Piolo?

Not long time ago, Piolo used to be referred to as 'The Next Goma". His TVC's "I love you Piolo" turned out be a success like Goma's Rowing for Bench. Both were then alluded to this 'Papa ng Bayan" status. It takes one TVC for a new Papa to be elevated to this kind of ' Ng Bayan" status. And it takes hundreds of Pinoy Bakla to make it happen. Thanks to us, girls!

Is Aljur's Century Hotdog TVC the new "I Love You, Piolo"? Pinoys are talking about it, and the gays drool. Another viral Pinoy TVC that can upraise a male Matinee Idol to a higher status. Seeing that Piolo is getting older and boring, is Aljur then be the new Papa ng Bayan? Maricris, my Pop commentary gay friend says so: "Aljur's attractiveness we cannot deny. Ask that half-Pinay/half-Moon Ai-Ai or that high class bakla Tim Yap, they will agree with me! Irresistible!"

"Its the Eyes" says Maricris. "There's something about his eyes. Mysterious and sexy, they're like saying "cum and get me". He'll definitely be The Next Piolo" she added. But I disagree: "How can he be the next Piolo. He can't act!" Maricris opposes: "Yes. Piolo can act but Goma can?". "Yes, he was good in Dahas" says I. "It doesnt matter" says Maricris. "John Arcilla can also act, had he ever been referred to as our Papa ng Bayan?". OK, got your point, Maricris! But for me, let's wait for a little bit more. Aljur is almost there, but not yet. Pls lang!

First Look (And Sound)

2011-06-02T02:33:00.000-07:00

Britain and Ireland's Next Top Model Cycle 7 is coming soon. Here's the first look:

Maldita ang Lola Elle nyo! Davu? Win ang bru! But mas maldita ang Song na ginamit ha! Atribida! Any of you wondering kung ano sya.... eto. Googled especially for those who are interested. (Alam ko na may mga bakla pa rin out there na mahilig sa new music other than Lady Gaga's and Adele's). Go!

It's Veni Vidi Vici by Black Lips! So love kuh! Pls lang!

Trip Lang!

2011-05-31T17:57:00.000-07:00

TRAVEL is my "raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens". The build up of excitement days before any trip is like "Silver-white winters that melt into springs". It is truly one of my favorite..... hmmm, my favorite thing!

The atmosphere of arriving in any new place is comforting. The warmth of something new embraces you the moment you've touched a nonnative ground. Your senses help you feel her welcome. The smell of her food (or it's people in some cases), The touch of its climate, The sound of a new language, The taste of its local cuisine; The humor of its culture,... all new to you. Anything 'New' amazes most of us. Somehow, all I want is to be amazed and Traveling never fails to provide.

Being from Iloilo as a child, I always wanted to go to Manila. Local Philippine destinations were once my dream targets. My first ever travel out of my native village was in nearby Guimaras Island. Back then, Guimaras was a sub-province of Iloilo, so its not considered as out-of-town trip but that was my first ever experience of riding a Banca. Something i wont forget as a child.

When i was about 9 yrs old. Mom and Dad brought me to Cebu, my first ever Plane Ride .. and my first ever Hotel (Montebello Hotel). Being a kid, riding a plane and seeing Cebu was one of my happiest moments. Maybe, this is when my love of travel started. New experiences stop me from my track.

I was 12 when I first visited Manille. Luneta and the Manila Zoo were a must. But eating at Jollibee and McDo was the thing ill never forget about Manila. It was something new to me. At that time, we dont have those in Iloilo yet. The large Coke amazed me. And the fries never tasted that good.

I first visited Boracay when half of the island has no electricity yet; When Bazura was still the 'In" place to go at night; When you can still see a group of fish swimming at The White Beach; and When a lot of Foreigners do naked sunbathing without hesitation. I was 15. Of course with Family.

The first time I traveled with Friends was also in Boracay. Those with Mama O, Ekra, Kelly and others. All we did was Swim, Eat, Drink and Dance. Yes, no Sex... we were still teenagers at that time, when Mama O used to be fat. Charot! Every six months we went. We were lucky to have a friend whose family has a resort there. Win!

Bohol, Bacolod, Cagayan de Oro and Camiguin were the rest of the places in The Philly i've been to.

My first ever trip outside the country was Sydney (Yes! had my first ever Gay Parade @ age 25!). Dubai was next until I moved and lived here in San Francisco. America needs to be explored too. Seen the Grand Canyon, Niagara Falls, Chicago, LA, DC, Vegas, Toronto, etc but Asia is, so far, my favorite destination. The beaches in Thailand and its people (what a sex trip! Ching!), The Angkor Wat, Kathmandu, Bali, but the one that amazed me most? INDIA! (Northern India to be specific)... despite my unpleasant experience with some of its people, the place is still truly as they advertised it, Incredible!

I’d love to visit more travel destinations as much as I can. If I could afford it and get more vacation hours from work, i'll go every six months. I want to do it now when my knees are still strong enough to endure the adventure. When health is still wealthy. Here's more places I want to See:

Phillippines: El Nido, Caramoan, Banaue/Sagada, Batanes and Vigan

And the Rest..... (My Top 5 Dream Destinations):

5. Petra, Jordan

4. Iceland

3. Machu Picchu, Peru

2. Easter Island, Chile

1. Maldives

One thing I learned from traveling is that when we travel we begin to realize there is more than one way to live life and be happy. We learn to understand, we learn about other people's differences, and sometimes, we learn to discover something new about ourselves. Kaya tara na mga Bakla, Biyahe tayo! Tse!

*This post is inspired by Kalansay's Falling In Love In Four Days.

Stupidity or Art?

2011-05-26T14:32:00.000-07:00

Planking is the act of lying face down with arms to the sides of the body (like a plank of wood), in unusual public spaces and photographing it. Planking started in the UK a few years ago but some Brisbane boys put it on Facebook this year and like anything viral it has become a fad.

Just plain crazy to me, a silly pastime... but lets face it, to some,.. it's an Art, or even a Sport... an accomplishment something to be proud of (especially to young people). I admit, it looks cool at first but it becomes crazier and unintelligible as it goes along. Planking in a more complex way turned out to be popular. The more heights, in a more unusual setting.. the more praises you'll get.

Recently, a 20-year-old Aussie guy plunged to his death after planking on a seventh-floor balcony in Brisbane. Sad, but to some kids, this news makes Planking more challenging and wanted. The riskier it is the more fun and adventure you'll get. An allusion why the youth is screwed nowadays.

Odd behavior by youngsters is a global phenomenon. The internet is truly becoming a gadget of a lot of oddities. People do weird stuff for attention. Who's to blame? Who else but all of us. Somehow, the depths of stupidity never cease to amaze and entertain.

What will they think of next? It is getting shallow than ever na. Please lang!

PFW: Holiday 2011 Top 12 Looks

2011-05-21T01:47:00.000-07:00

No chance for us to see the Philippine Fashion Week: Holiday. But great thanks to StyleBible, for the update. LTE's a big electric fan of Philippine Fashion and for people like us who is far from Manille, Style Bible is giving us a big favor. Kaya, Salute to you (and thanks for the pics)!

No jaw-dropping complete collection for us this season BUT there are a lot of individual pieces that are quite impressive. Here is our TOP 12 Favorite Looks. (In no order, click to enlarge)..

Emi Alexander-Englis, Ronaldo Arnaldo, Marlon Rivera

Aries Lagat, Arnold Galang, Bo Parcon

Jian Lasala, Don Protasio, Yako Reyes

Yvonne Quisumbing, MBaretto, Randy Ortiz

Say nyo? Chos! Mabuhay ang Philippine Fashion! Please lang!

Charlie's Angels 2011

2011-05-18T02:02:00.000-07:00

ABC is reviving Charlie's Angels this Fall! Hmm.... ilang beses na i-remake to ha... buhay pa rin hanggang ngayon. Ano kaya ang bago? Syem ang casting! Bagong Trio. Mga bagong mukha nina Kate, et al. Carry kaya nila? Eto sila:

Wag nyo na akong tanungin kung anong mga pangalan nila. Browse nyo na lang. Medyo di ako interested. Chos! Kung Pinoy Version siguro ng Charlie's Angels, papanoorin ko pa. ABS-CBN, gawan nyo nga! Pls lang! Pambato sa Temptation Island reboot ng GMA Films.

Casting Game: (Oo laro ko to! Hayaan nyo na ang bakla. Tse!)

Sino ang bagay na trio cast kaya sa Pinoy version, kung meron man? Teka.... Toni Gonzaga? Kulang sa Sex Factor; Christine Reyes? Over sa Sex Factor!; Andi Eigenmann? Pwede sana kaya lang medyo chubilita (Ching!); Kim Chui? Super payat naman, di sya pang action!; Angel Aquino? Old! Empress Schuck? Young! Bea Alonzo? Dry!; KC Concepcion? Super Dry!....

Kaya eto na lang ang pwedeng pwede: The Triple A:

Anne, Angel, and Alessandra!

Win ito kung matuloy man! ABS, pag-isipan nyo. Wala naman kayong bagong idea eh, kaya ayan! Go! Para win! Pls lang!

(At sino naman kaya ang magiging boses ni Charlie? Si Eddi Garcia ba? Si Big Brother? or Gus Abelgas? Tse!)

Reality Check

2011-05-17T06:26:00.000-07:00

Reality TV Competitions get to my nerves!. I dunno about you but its like a love-hate relationship between me and my TV. You'd feel hurt, betrayed, disappointed, and angry if your fave contenders didnt pull it off; Feel sad with their letdowns; Frustrated when their fate is futile; and Hate if the Hated and Evil wins. But at the end, it brings me, (with realities' veracity),.... Laughter. After all, it played a joke on me.

This season's The Amazing Race's (Unfinished Business) Finale was quite dull. Won by the most boring team among this season's party, Kisha and Jen. The most adorable team fell short at the Finale. And the "Good Ones" were poor second. To go back, my emotions run high when the deaf-mute Luke judged himself a disappointment to his Mom after hours of frustration in finding the right Tea in India. Also felt really bad when they let that mentally challenged Autistic Zev dance in Brazil, causing their team's elimination. Though my favorite contestants didnt make it this time, The Amazing race is still..... well, amazing for me!

If you want to preview how the Anti-Christ will manipulate us in the future, go watch Survivor:Redemption Island. See how the winner, Boston Rob, reached the top with his Lies and Double-dealing. He deceived everyone with his Charisma; Hid his black-hearted objective with False loyalty to his tribe; Had a personal relationship to each and everyone on his side promising them each success and reward only to to blind-side them at the end; Any sign of disloyalty to this guy will surely put you in great danger (to be eliminated); he chose the most hated of the tribe and the most useless to bring with him to the Final 3, so for him to appear good, leaving the jury to choose nobody but him for the win. He has a following amongst the tribe, it's like a cult. They do whatever he says. And of how he does it? Brilliant! That would how the Anti-Christ be. So be warned.

This leaves me to one more.... Tonight is the ANTM Finale. No worries with regard to evil-ness this time. Alexandria, has been eliminated as early as that. Two of my favorites made it to the Finals. Its either Molly or Brittani. Ill go for Molly for the Covergirl shoot. But the pic below shows Brittani has the "It". I dunno but.... at this moment, I am contended. Whoever wins, Im happy. Unlike this season of The Amazing Race and Survivor.... ANTM will bring me content. Sa wakas. Tse!

Bruhang Britani na toh! Pls lang!

Di Ko Kinaya

2011-05-04T03:51:00.000-07:00

Di ko kinaya ang picture na to. Nawala tuloy ang antok ko sa kakatawa. Kaloka!

The most popular Flower Girl ... ever! Pls lang!

Shoutouts!

2011-04-04T22:33:00.000-07:00

... from the past 4 weeks of being away.

- Always cannot wait for the Fat One to be eliminated on ANTM!

- Rapunzel looks better in short and dark hair.

- Tens of wheelchairs lining up in PAL US Flights. The Pinoy elderly loves to travel!

- Why is third-world Bali so expensive,..... fucking?

- Cambodia-based Pinoy designer Don Protasio wears Red Briefs!

- When it rains, its Four. Because with me, Sky is the Langit! -Luis Batchoy

- Bangkok's massage 'therapists' are better looking than Phuket's!

- Kuala Lumpur's gay sister says Pinas has the best looking Go-Go Boys.

- I dont see Stress on Pinoy faces! What's wrong with America?

- Kawadjan snores like Little Red Riding Hood...... ('s Big Bad Wolf).

To endure, that is all! - Rilke (Thanks Batchoy!)

The Pee Pose

2011-02-08T02:20:00.000-08:00

Nanette Medved is doing the Pee Pose in this month's Mega!

The last time someone did it was just months ago by Amanda Griffin in Rogue....

Reminds me of Lucy Liu.....

and the Koreanna Yunjim Kim....

Even an Oscar Winner does it too: Rachel Weisz...

And Pop Stars also: Amy Winehouse

But only one made it as Cover: Marisa Miller.

However, no one does it openly wide but our Tita Tyra Banks!

May you all Pee well today mga Bakla! Pls lang!

The Dinagyang Butts

2011-01-24T16:38:00.000-08:00

Missed the Dinagyang Festival... Missing the butts! Charot!

May pagkabading talaga tong Dinagyang na toh. Maka-attend nga next year. Pls lang!

[Pictures by Hawili Hurom.]

OMG Danica!

2011-01-23T02:44:00.000-08:00

OMG! Danica Magpantay of the Philippines is Ford Supermodel of the World 2011!!! Di ko ma carry ang self kow! I thought this wont ever happen in my Bergen lifetime. Charooooot!

Danica Magpantay, 16, Philippines!!!!

Alienesque ang dating! Bongga! Congrats Lola! You make us proud talaga. Mana ka talaga sa Nanay mo! Ms Lala Flores: Best Smile Model of the World 19-forgotten.

Parang gusto ko tuloy mag-pop ng Champagne? Patikim lang pala sina Charlene and Charo. Pasabog itong Danica na ito! And take note ha: Hinde Heusaff ang last name nya. Pls lang!

Anong say ng mga bakla? Tse!

Black Swan

2011-01-15T21:51:00.000-08:00

"Don't let the Black Swan in you, kill you". -Ekra Tan

Ibigay na kasi ang award sa bruhang ito! Kanyang kanya na ang Trophy. Pls Lang!

The Filipino Surname

2011-01-02T22:00:00.000-08:00

The Muhlachs started it all. One of the first foreign-sounding last names in Philippine Showbiz. Or was it brought into being by O'Brien (Baby)? Established by Bonnevie (Dina)? Or set up by Discher (Etang)?

Not so long ago we heard of:

Dixson (Alice), Medved (Nanette), Taylor (Maui), Dalrymple (Serena), Bovick (Aleck), Page (Amanda), Bunevacz (David), Turvey (Brad), Agassi (Carlos), Carlson (Maria Teresa), Jones (Angelica), Miles (Aubrey), and The Prats (including Mia),

With them adding fuel to the fire:

Curtis (Ann), Milby (Sam), De Rossi (Alex and Assunta), Geisler (Baron), Wilson (Maggie), Gerbach (Melanie), Anderson (Gerald), Andrews (Bobby), Khouny (Uma), Kurdi (Yasmien), Moto (Iwa), and Ramsay (Derek)

Filipinos are no longer referred to as 'The Asians with Spanish surnames'. We are becoming International. It is because we are everywhere na talagah! Sa totoo lang. And to also add, gone were the days when Chinese Family names are exclusively for the Pinoy Business World only. Now we have them in Showbiz too... Hello Kim Chiu and Echong Dee!

And gosh ha! they wont stop. Let's welcome the new breed:

Mische (Jewel), Heusaff (Solenn), Guidicelli (Matteo), Younghusband (Phil), Schuck (Empress), Batherson (Ian), Stroem (Markki), Ricks (Melissa), Raj (Venus) and of course The Eigenmanns.

Butt.....

If there is one to be awarded with the most exotic and unusual name in Pinoy Showbiz ever, that would, without question, goes to...... Jackie Kookooritchkin! Taray ano? Pls lang!

Petty Words From Our Sponsors

2011-01-01T16:00:00.000-08:00

"I hate playing Stupid so much.. but It's like the smartest thing to do right now."
-Jud "Fabio" Birza, Survivor-Nicaragua

"Sometimes, Children are Bad People too"
-Cate Blanchett (Hanna Trailer)

"Thank You Nothingness!"
-Alanis Morissette

I am swamped with future bills for 2011! Gosh! It worries me but this is not the best time to think about it. Kina-ugali-an, the first day of the new year is supposed to be full of hope and wishes and resolutions. Davu?

After pondering with some pretty words from our sponsors, I thought, things can also turn out to be opposites of what they are. The negative can also be right after all. Somehow, 2011 can be a good year too! Happy New Year to ALL! Pls lang!

"Even the wrong words seem to rhyme"

-Howie Day (Collide)

The New Old

2010-12-30T01:11:00.000-08:00

I accepted na me being old when I noticed Lito Pimentel and Rey PJ Abellana's wrinkles in Juanita Banana. They used to be our Zanjoe Marudo and Rafael Rossel back then. Gosh!

Yes, gosh talagah... those days when hooded short-sleeve T-Shirts were in vogue. Those days when Inday Garutay was our Vice Ganda.

The Coco Martin of our time, Julio Diaz..... having grey hair? And where the hell is our version of Boy Abunda... Mr. Nap Gutierrez? Patay na? Chos!

Too much of the Kimerald Fans drama. I miss The Sheryl-Romnick Fans Club. Sila'y talagang kakaloka! And please lang.... Walang war ala Christine Reyes VS Sarah Geronimo noon ha... ask mo sina Maricel and Snooky. Mababait ang mga tao noon in ferness, pwera lang kay Divina Valencia! Charot!

Sadly to some, Richard Gomez and Aga Mulach are now considered as 'Daddies' by the badushki crowd. It's official, Piolo Pascual and Dingdong Dantes are the new Richard and Aga. Walang kokontra!

The Ana Roces Syndrome: She used to be pop but her Mestiza Beauty didnt last. Too dry and bland. Reminds me of her modern version.... Bea Alonzo. Be careful of your career Bea! Wag gayahin si Ana (Roces man or Abiera).

Anita Linda and Mary Walter were our only two Lolas back then. Now there is Gloria Romero and Gina Parreno (who used to play Mommies pa lang noon). Mga Lola na sila ngayon! Tse!

Goodbye ST Films Hello Gay Indie. The hairy Anton Bernardo replaced by the smooth Marco Morales. The new Ara, Maui, and Aubrey: Adrian Rancho, Janvier Daly, and Kenjie Garcia. Ching!

And the list goes on... Martin and Gary/Christian and Eric; Gretchen Baretto/Angelika Panganiban; Nova Villa/Eugene Domingo; Jaypee De Guzman/Zaijan Jaranilla; Maria-Isabel Lopez/Maria Venus Raj... etc, etc.

But there is one thing that has died down: Pinoy Action Films. There were no new Rudy Fernandez, Monsour Del Rosario and of course, Robin Padilla (who is still Robin Padilla the last time i've checked). Di na ata uso ang bugbugan.... pa-cute na lang! Di ba Enchong? Pls lang!

Question: Bakit tumaba si Aiko?

Three Kings

2010-12-26T01:40:00.001-08:00

Kung may Tatlo mang Hari ang dadalaw sa akin ngayong gabi, sila na mga 'teh!

Sila ang tatlong bagong kinagigiliwan ng inyong baklang lingkod. Si Lyka Bergen po... Nangangarap! Ching!

(Eh kayo? Sino ang Three Kings nyo? Pls lang!)

Photo Credits: Paolo by Biggie, Tom by Dan Douglas Ong, and Martin by Aiko Melendez. Charot!

Lyka's Christmas Song

2010-12-24T16:21:00.000-08:00

If there is a song to define my Christmas, this would be it:

Clearly not "Merry" but Beautiful. It sounds as though one is sad but actually makes him happy. Away from the noise, the celebration, the hoopla. Calm and restful like the sound of the night at the manger where the Savior was born. There will be no Three Kings bearing gifts, but there will be Tranquility, Peace, and Alleviation. In other words, Ka-charotan!

Merry Christmas!

Share Wear

2010-12-19T09:25:00.001-08:00

Si Ekra po ito nag-uulat.

Nag Christmas party ang Mama O at yours truly Miss Ekra with co workers, and I had the opportunity to make 2 dresses for 2 of my fashionable co workers. Heto ang mga pics.

Nag enjoy naman ang mga bruha, at panay ang promote sa mga guests ng party! Alam mo naman ako maypagka-shy so puro lang smile without teeth ang response ng bakla. Charing. I also made another dress pero walang sumuot kasi walang magkasya! A friend is wearing it here when she visited sa bahay.

So ayan medyo nakakarami na rin sa pananahi ang Lola Ekra nio. Sana dumami pa next year. I will try to put up a blog/site and eventually just sell dresses from there. Which reminds me, HINDI PA NAGBABAYAD ANG MGA PUNYETANG CO WORKERS NA IYAN!!!!!

Nagmamahal,
Ekra Tan

Which Baklang Princess Are You?

2010-12-13T02:45:00.001-08:00

Which Baklang Princess Combination are you?

1. CINDERELLA Baklang Social Climber. Mahilig mag party kahit wiz pera. Charing!

2. RAPUNZEL Home-body ang drama ng bakla. Di lumalabas ng bahay pero in fairness, mahaba ang buhok. Dahil dinadayo ito ng mga kalalakihang nakilala nya sa Craigslist or Planet Romeo. Bongga!

3. SNOW WHITE Baklang pa-sweet pero tanga! Madaling ma-uto. Hello?

4. BELLE (Beauty and the Beast): Mahilig sa pangit (sa mga kaibigan man or BF) para excel ang beauty! Taray!

5. AURORA (Sleeping Beauty): Boring na bading! Hintay ng hintay kay Prince charming. Wiz ginagawa para mahapan sya. Kainis!

6. MULAN Definitely, Pa-Mhin-ta! Super tago ang pagkabading!

7. JASMINE Adventurous na badush. Ms International: Gustong matikman ang lahat na Lahi. Everyday is a whole new world!

8. ARIEL (The Little Mermaid): Ambisyosang bakla! Yun lang!

9. POCAHONTAS Mahilig sa Puti. Basta Caucasian, go! Basa ang panty kung may puting Foreigner sa vicinity. Kaloka!

10. THUMBELINA Anofa nga va? Baklang maliit ang nota!

LTE's Princess Combi.

EKRA TAN: Mulan/Pocahontas/Ariel

(Oo, ambisyosa ang lola nyo kaya Ariel sya! Mahilig din sa puti kaya Pocahontas. At super Pa-Mhin-ta ha, kainis! Very ingat malaman ang tunay na sexuality. Talo si Mulan)

MAMA O: Jasmine/Cinderalla/Rapunzel

(Oo, dinadayo sa bahay ang Mama O, sa totoo lang. Mahaba ang buhok kahit di lumalabas ng bahay katulad ni Zel. Mahilig kasi sa Craigslist at Adam4Adam. Willing to host pa ang gagah. Sometimes, 3 Princes a day sya ha with different nationalities yan! kaya Jasmine din ang loka! Diva-divahan! And of course, galing sa bibig nya mismo, Social Climber raw sya! Kaya May pagka-Cinderella din sya ha. Charing!)

And for me, sige na nga.

LYKA BERGEN:Combi ako nina Aurora, dahil boring ako sa totoo lang at hinhintay ko pa rin ang Prince Charming ko. Malapit na maging 40, wala pa rin! Leche! May pagka Snow White din ako. Tanga sa pag-ibig. Na-uuto ng mga kalalakihan. And lastly, gosh! Ill be honest. Thumbelina ako. Yuck!

Tse ninyong lahat!

Survived But Disappointed

2010-12-03T06:57:00.000-08:00

Been watchin GMA's Survivor - Celebrity Edition since Day 1. Not only because of John Hall's abs, but also the whole reality spectacle behind it. Ching!

TOP 4: Solenn Heussaff, Akihiro Sato, Aubrey Miles and Ervic Vijandre

The castaway I wanted to be voted out first early in the game was Aki. Never liked the guy. I dunno why. Maybe because of my silly view of Brazilians working as models in our beloved crowntry, soothing the cultural notion of foreigners as better looking people compared to Lapu-Lapu and Marikudo's children.

When Raymund's straight twin announced him as the Sole Celebrity Survivor, i was not happy at all. I was disappointed big time. (Thus, the urge to blog about it). If you have followed the entire show, you will understand. He was Mr Nice Guy at first, but at the end, he turned out to be just like everyone else. Opportunistic and self-serving. Desperate!

He won three out of seven votes. Those three from the Jury who voted for him deserve to be sent to play Survivor-Iraq. Ching! Charit lang! Am sure they have their own fine and delicate reasons naman. Tse!

If I were to choose among the remaining four, I will give it to Aubrey. She was the only one who played the game as how it is suppose to be be played. I hate the fact that she was the only one thinking after Jon was voted out after the Merge. The others were mere nothing (maybe except for Solenn). They dont leche think! And make a dare move. Kainis!

I really dont care about Aub's story (wanting to win the 3 Million to help fight to earn more custody time with her boy). She was the conductor of every tribal council orchestra. I love her wit. Thus, IMO, deserves to be winner.

My Sentimental Vote goes to Ervic. This guy needs a break. You can see in his eyes and body language how much he wanted this. After the hideous Pinay Marimar dumped him for a Ding Dong? And Jon's tirade about him proving himself as not just Marian's Ex and calling him "walang kwenta" (or something to that effect) in national TV? I feel sorry for him.

At the Final Night when Ruffa's brother is reading the votes, I noticed him grabbing or holding something in his pocket. A kinda Lucky charm or an amulet or maybe a rosary if he was Catholic. I just wanted him to win that night. But the Brapanese won. I was disheartened for him. Moreover, he lost to a contestant whom I dont want to win.

But the real winner of this show...... Solenn. Her beauty got noticed and she won the heart of the host. Malandi ang bruha! Kaloka! Congrats!

-----O-----

Thank you GMA for bringing us Survivor. Although there's still a lot to improve in editing and camera works department, I say Good Job! for entertaining me for weeks. Project Runway kaya next? Pwede? Pls lang!

Balintawak

2010-11-19T02:19:00.000-08:00

Cant wait to see you in March! The "Pray" Leg of our 2011 tour. Luluhod ako, promise!

Mr Indonesia Thomas Sebastian

First Dress Sold

2010-11-04T13:29:00.001-07:00

Tonight, I am handing over this dress to a friend who is wearing it for a beach wedding in the Philippines this November. This is the first dress I've custom made for a client and got paid for. Presyong kaibigan naman ito kasi partly birthday gift din nia. Seventy dollars ang singil ng Aling Ekra. Simple dress but quite sexy and sophistimacated. Embroidered linen, with zipper and hook eye, and fusible interfacing ang mga ginamit na notions ng mananahing Ekra. Chos.

Taghirap ngayon kaya dapat bumenta din kahit papaano.

Pics taken from my cheap Nokia phone lang ito. Kaya laitin nio na lang ang sarili nio.

This is sorta monumental for me. Keeps me inspired to pursue The Dream. The Impossible Dream. Dreamgirls. Dream Catcher. Mr. Dreamboy. Makulit, I know.

Nagmamahal,

Ekra

P.S. Sorry di ko naplantsa. Dami pa kasing tatahiin. ASOS!

Tessa-mazing Race

2010-10-22T03:12:00.000-07:00

Mabuhay! Welcome to Misibis Bay, Philippines!

Kakagulat naman tong si Tessa! Ibang klase! Haneeeep!

Tessa Prieto-Valdez greets Amazing Race Asia 4 teams as they arrived at the Pit Stop of their Philippine Leg of the race in Legazpi City. Maganda ang panonood ko ng bigla naman bang nag Welcome ang bruha! Kaloka! Nagulat ang bakla! Naging interesting pa dahil sa bright and mabulaklakin nyang dress. In fairy ness!

Matingnan nga ulit....

Oh? Di ba bongga? Di ko makaya! Pero bakit sya? Pls lang!

At bakit hinde na lang sya?......

"Charoooot! Welcome to Zoren Legazpi , Philippines!"

(Amazing Race Asia 4's photos by Jojie Alcantara).

Pretty Ugly

2010-10-05T01:31:00.000-07:00

The Bakla who represents the Pinoy Gay Community on GMA's Survivor Philippines - Celebrity Edition is another annoying junk that cheapens us down in Philippine Culture. How can Pinoy Society's point of view on who we are change if we continue to illustrate ourselves as someone to ridicule at?

We are represented by another crap... something to laugh at, or something to pity, the one that nobody cannot take seriously. I was so upset that, yet again, we had to endure the thought of a Pinoy homosexual as a loud and irritating creature who is inadequate and feeble, I wanted to throw something at the screen. Now I understand why some straights refer to us, not as a "he" or a "she", but an "it".

I am taking about Pretty Trizsa.

Yes, there are awful and obnoxious people in the world who happen to be gay, and of course it's understandable that they should be reflected on our TV screen. Unfortunately, in The Philly Islands' boob-tubes, they are very much visible, including Reality TV shows such as Survivor-Philippines, creating misleading generalization about people like you and me.

Pls lang, Trizsa, You added another negative undertone to the word "Bakla". That is why Jon Hall and those cute castaway hunks want to vote you out first. Give yourself (and us) some respect. Give us something to thank you for. Pls lang!

HappyLand

2010-09-28T03:11:00.000-07:00

I smell City Of God....

Parang may kulang. Or parang TH ang datetch. Ewan! Trailer pa lang naman. Pero parang di ko sya panoorin. Jim Libiran, wala na bang iba? Pls lang!

3 Hours Of Gay Cinematic Vibe

2010-09-27T20:05:00.000-07:00

Gay and Experimental

Amazing Cinematography.

Less Talk.

Soft Porn.

Latinos.

If you're into all those in one, LTE recommends you to watch:

Rabioso Sol, Rabioso Cielo (Raging Sun, Raging Sky) 2009 by Julian Hernandez

This post is not to rate the film. Just a recommendation from a fellow bakla who love art films. Chos! Spare some time to watch it. Its 192 minutes will make you sticky and occupied, depending on your taste level. Try a little bit of what i am talking about here:

Hiyang ba? Goooooo! Watch it. Now na!

Phil, Ali and Sam

2010-09-22T00:39:00.000-07:00

Prologue:

I was born for Phil. But today, I said goodbye to him. Phil whom Ive loved so much. And will still love forever. Despite of not taking care of me very well as a partner, my heart will always belong to him. I left Phil a long time ago. We were pre-destined to be separated. But i did always do my best to see him once in a while as I can. It was a long distance love affair. Every time I am with him, even for just a short time, I feel the happiest.

Part 1: Phil

Phil is poor. Not blessed enough like the others. But it was his own fault for not doing his best. A guy with no goals. His mind corrupted. It was all "Bahala na!" He didnt provide me safety and comfort. I didnt even feel his Love for me. I figured I have no future with Phil, thus decided to leave him and seek for others. It hurts leaving him but I have no choice. I need to secure a better future for myself.

Part 2: Ali

My quest brought me to Ali. He provided me all of what i needed at that time: Freedom from disarray. My family was delighted to have him in my life. He's super rich, that's why. Though my heart doesn't belong to him, the sex were great. As we go along, I learnt how to accept Ali's Islamic culture but his family didnt embrace me. They saw me as just another girl from a third-world country, like their maid or their saleslady. I still chose to stick with him for all that, but left him eventually upon knowing his secret: his heart belongs to the Blondes. I was nothing for him but a servant, sex included. We lasted 4 and a half years.

Part 3: Sam

Not that long after Ali, I met Sam. For the past 8 years of my life, Sam has been good to me, offering me ease and opulence. He embraced me as who I am and even encouraged me to speak out and be independent. He taught me how to value myself. Motivated me to follow my dreams and gave me the opportunity to achieve them. He gave me everything what Phil and Ali cannot give. He is the whole shebang!

Sam's quite popular, good-looking and affluent, whom every family wants for their daughters. My friends envied me for having him. His family treated me as their own. Sam is my honey. The fantastic years we have together was my basis for good chances. He is the total package. Comfort, acceptance, and attachment to each other. That being so, 4 months ago, I asked his hand for Marriage. With no hiccups, he accepted my proposal.

Today, I was married to Sam. At the ceremony, mixed emotions ignited. I was happy to have him forever but there was something that pains me deep inside. I thought of Phil. My heart is still with my beloved Phil but my conviction, my allegiance is now with Sam. But when the priest said "you can now kiss the bride", Sam kissed me with all of his heart. He embraced me. He gave me importance. I never felt that love before. It was real.

Epilogue:

Tonight, I'm writing this while Sam is sleeping. I promised to love him like the way i loved Phil. And to Phil, you will always be in my heart. No matter what. Even though, you dont give back the love I have for you, Ill keep on coming back. And the good thing is, Sam doesn't mind and even encourages me to do so.

Checking Charlene's Progress

2010-09-18T01:50:00.000-07:00

Just checking Charlene Almarvez's developments in New York under Ford.

She has a total of 8 shows in this recent NY Fashion Week so far. Walking in some up and coming designers like Rachel Roy and to some more established ones like Diane Von Furstenberg. And yes, she closes one of the shows. That of budding Juan Carlos Obando's.

Here she is in some Spring/Summer 2011 shows at NY Fashion Week:

[click photos to enlarge]

Oh di ba? Sana masapawan ang inabot ni Tita Anna Bayle natin. Next stop: Europe! Wala pa atang working permit. Pero teka, asan na ang Ate Charo Ronquillo ninyo? Ze-rowena? Pang catalog lang ata ang lola ninyo. Butt... More power pa rin sa kanilang dalawa. Sana madagdagan pa ang mga Pinay rampadora sa NY at kung saan pa. Kung babae lang sana si Paolo Roldan. Please lang!

Next Top Model Favorites

2010-09-16T20:08:00.000-07:00

Tyra started it all. America's Next Top Model is in its 15th Season. Anything new? Vogue-Italia's spread as one of the prices. Plus IMG model agency to manage the winner. Also DVF, Zac Posen and Patricia Field as guest judges and Patrick Demarchelier as one of the photographers.

Promising huh? But how about the girls? At this point, Kendal is the one to watch.

America's Next Top Model: Kendal

I already love her the first time she showed up. The hindrance could be her age. At 23, she's somewhat old. But no worries, the body structure and the aura can deceive that. Ill put my money on Kendal for now. Rhianna is, by far, my second choice. Since the competition has just begun, Im not high as a kite yet. But i would be glad to see Terra, one of the sisters, to go soon. She doesnt spell M-O-D-E-L at all! Gosh! kainis! But the anorexic has to go first. Annamaria's unhealthy look was gruesome!

Concurrently, Australia's version is in its 6th Season. Sad to say, my favorite girl has been eliminated two weeks ago. Her name is Kathryn. How dare them send her home with this picture:

Australia's Next Top Model: Kathryn

Australia's next top models are the most promising in my opinion. The show itself is the most unpredictable among the franchises. Maybe they just have stronger and the most fierce-looking contestants to begin with. Now, with only 3 models left dreaming big in Japan (AusNTM's chosen country for the famed "abroad trip"), the competition has lost its steam for me. Since they got rid of Kathryn + (the odd-looking) Jessica, I really dont care who will win now. On second thought, Pls wag lang ang over-confident na bruhang, Sophie!

On the other hand, Australia's little sister, New Zealand, is on their 2nd Season. It is not that intoxicating as Australia's but it's still an interesting show to watch. It's Next Top Model, anyways. Di va, girls? My favorite this season: Danielle.

New Zealand's Next Top Model: Danielle

Danielle has the looks and the X-Factor but that's not quite enough. It pains me when I see her in the runway. Plus she doesn't give her best in pictorials. You have this girl, who does nothing in the photo-shoots but at the end, develops a good editorial. That's a big plus but her runway is her downfall.

If America has Sisters included in their line-up, New Zealand has Twins, Nellie and Elza. They look exactly the same, thus their Make-over were decided to be the same too. Ngeeek! I would have loved to watch them in different looks, that would be more stirring.

Meanwhile, Britain's is in their 6th season. Only 4 girls remain. Among them is Joy, my favorite to win.

Britain's Next Top Model: Joy

Britain's is probably the most boring and unexciting Next Top Model (first-world) franchise. The girls are not that high-calibre, the challenges and the photo-shoots were lame. Putting Elle as host didnt even help. And Julien MacDonald as judge is sooo annoying. Their chosen country destination: Malaysia. At least Jimmy Choo was there to grace the show. (I didnt know na he's Malaysian pala). Joy against Tiffany for the Finale, please lang gid!

How about the Philippine's? What happened to our own franchise? Grendel needs to pass on her bandana. As in now na!

Philippines' Next Top Model: Grendel

But unfortunately, the first installment didnt create that much buzz I guess. Philippines is not ready for her next top model yet. We are just busy looking for our next Pop Superstar or the Next Matinee Idol or the next Venus Raj. We just dont have time for Fashion at this time. Even Project Runway-Philippines didnt work. Kaya wiz na muna rampa-rampa. Payag ba kayo nyan mga bading? Pls lang!

Kung Straight Ako?

2010-09-14T02:14:00.001-07:00

Townspeople of Baklette, Philippines!!! Have you ever wonder ba kung sino ang pagnanasaan nyo to the max kung kayo ay pinanganak na Straight? Gosh! Kadiri to the second degree to some ang thought na titch di ba? But for the sake of conversation, kung tatanungin kayo ni Mayor Boy Abunda sa Bottomline ng tanong na to? Sinong Vagina Alajar ang isasagot nyo?

Isa lang ang nasa-isip ko Tito Boy. Siya lang.........

Lovi Poe

Ma-explain ba ang pag-nanasa ko sa kanya? Ewan. Di ko alam. Ang alam ko lang ay this girl's sex appeal is a free-flowing honey. Nakaka-tempt dilaan. Chos! She is like an exotic flower from the mountains of Kiri (wherever it is). I love the way she projects her ooomph kasi. So if i were straight, I think my Junior will always play with his five sisters every time Lovi Poe is in mind. Mukha kasi syang Callboy. Double Chos! Pls lang! Tito Boy! Bakla pa rin ako noh!

Lovi sometimes looks like Angel Locsin. Pero sometimes parang si KC Concepcion din. Sometimes, parang combination nila. Or is it me lang talaga?

Basta yun Tito Boy! Sya ang sagot ko sa tanong mo. Kayo? Kung naging Straight kayo? Sinong girlalou ang pag-fafantasyahan nyo? Tse!

The Hate Issue

2010-09-07T17:30:00.000-07:00

We all have our own list of People We Love to Hate. Here's mine:

1. Mariel Rodriguez: I hate OA. But sometimes OA can be cute but too much OA is loathsome. Mariel's OA-ness is to the max na and to make it worse, she thinks its cute. I am already asar of her even before Robin pa. Gosh! Now, with Robin's status, her OA-ness have reached the peak of Mt. Kilimanjaro na. OA na ang pagka-OA nya! I cant stand it! She looks cheap!

2. Marian Rivera: Speaking of cheap.... gosh! That's all! (kayo na bahalang mag analyze). But we also heard that she is a prima-donna bitch victimizing new pretty girl talents who constitute the aura of leveling-up with her in the future. We dont know how true the story is, thus we wont dwell on that for now. All we can raise a stink about is... she's so distastefully baduy and unfortunately, any form of Baduyism works in our native land. (Dont get me wrong, we dont hate baduys. Here's to this: Juday's Baduyistic approach is a pole apart from Marian's Baduyism. I hope you get my point).

3. Mike Enriquez: He speaks like a big Joke. He looks like a bigger Joke. And GMA's choice to convey their news through him is the biggest Joke. I dont watch 24 Oras because of him. I am so annoyed of how he delivers the news. This guy is a comedian. How would you take him seriously? Pls lang. I am sooo asar!

4. Kris Aquino: I have a Love-Hate stance with this woman. I admit, I like Kris, the Kris then. But the Kris now is sooo different. Maybe that comes with being a Presidential Sister. She doesnt look real now. The help and care she have for the Filipino people is something new. Never seen from her before we put the letter 'P' in 'Noy' and the campaign. That is not what she was. And yes, people change naman di ba according to their present situation? But hers transmits as something fake. It's all pakitang tao to me. A yellow Plastic Bag from SM Supermarket. And her decision for annulment with James after the elections, is another crooked story.

5. Claudine Barretto: Claudine! You dont need these scandals. You are one of the best actresses in Philippine Cinema right now but girl, your insecurities are so palpable. Every scandal na pinapasukan mo ay puro awayan. Your asal-kalye dramas give us nausea and eventually, cause us to vomit you. Where's the class and the refinement girl? Angelica's silence topples you.

6. Willie Revillame: Hay naketch! If ASAR ako sa all of the above, PINAKA-asar naman ako with this pea-brained ass. I dunno where to start. We all know that he is mayabang. Nakikita naman sa TV of how much his head swelled up. I cannot wait for that to be bursted. He needs to be humbled. Now na! And to boot, he is also Bastos, Insensitive, etc. Aaay! Ewan. Let's not make patol na, lalo akong naiinis. Grrrr! Please TV 5 , give this moron a lesson. Please dont resuscitate him. Pls lang! Let his career die!

------O-----

I could be wrong with this people. I dont know them personally. My ASAR moments are just based on how they portray themselves on screen. As public entities, they are open for scrutiny. Just like the majority, I am just one customer patronizing this crap. Its never fun to hate but for this kind, I admit, it is.

35 Ways To Say... "Bongga!"

2010-09-02T20:15:00.000-07:00

Overheard from The-Orgy: [Topic: Coming Out]

At the risk of playing into stereotypes, I will dare consider coming out as the most macho thing a gay guy can do. - Jericho

I think that for people-like-us (plu's) this is our version of passage to manhood, only a bit more thematic. - Richie Dalope

Coming out is a journey. hindi siya natatapos sa mga salitang "oo, bakla ako." o sa kabilang dako "oo, tomboy ako." it is a continuous struggle, a continuous battle for the truth. - Desole Boy

We have demons, big and small, to fight, even before and after we come out of the closet. - Kiks

But the choice to do so will always be yours unless you wait for the time it will be taken from you. -Tobie

So my policy has always been: If they don’t ask, I don’t volunteer; but if they ask, I won’t lie. - McVie

I have never been out. Not to anyone. And will never come out. I will always be IN. - J

Mayroong mga mausisa at mayroon namang patay malisya. Iniladlad ko man o kusang lumabas ang aking kabaklaan, hindi na mahalaga. - Ms Melanie

Isnt coming out about acceptance in the first place? - Manila Raunch

I don't seek anyone's acceptance.... what matters is that i accept myself for who i am. that is more than enough... for now. - John Stanley

....for everyone out there who's afraid to come out, I'm not forcing you to come out, but let me tell you that when you do, it is at that moment when you realize who your true friends are and how much your family loves you. - Adam

Sa akin lamang, sa kahit anong sitwasyon, alam nating masasaktan at masasaktan ang ating pamilya sa oras na malaman nila na tayo ay taga sunod ni San Rio.- Boss Becky

Sa pamilya ko, hindi ito isyu. Di napag-usapan. Basta alam na nila. Yon na yon. Walang nagtanong, wala akong sinagot. Swerte yata ako at di bobo mga kaanak ko. - Mandaya Moore

Since I didn’t have the gumption to come up to either of my parents to boldly declare that I am homosexual, my plan was to leave them little clues here and there until it got to the point where they would have no choice but to ask me outright. - Zen Bitch

Your mother will always know. She may be in denial about it, but she probably knows. -Rocky

Mom, Dad, whiz ko na ever kayang mag hide cheverlu. Isa po akong sirena. - Ms. Chuniverse

(Mom) cried. It was heartbreaking to see someone as strong as her break down, but she had to understand that this was not something she could fix. It was not something that was broken in the first place. - Ex-Jason

Gusto ko maging masaya ka anak, tanggapin mo ang sarili mo na ganyan ka para matanggap ka din ng ibang tao. Di mo makukuha ang pagtanggap at respeto ng ibang tao kung hindi mo kayang ibigay yun sa sarili mo. - Miguel

I do not answer to anyone and I don’t owe anyone the definition of my sexuality. - Jaytee

Gender is a conception. A method and a label. A mere tool to create order, and by thus making the idea of it easily comprehensible. But where labels fail is when society defines the semiotics of these labels. - Red the Mod

Bisexual. Bi. Bi-yot. Metrosexual. Isang metro na lang bakla na. - Baklang Maton

I know I was different even when I was much younger, and yet I still had a hard time saying the "B" word out loud. - PJ

I am gay, and I am not ashamed of it. However, I don't think we all need to wave the proverbial rainbow flag. - Bobby Barbecho

Gaya nga ng sabi ko, masaya maging bakla, oo, pero mahirap din ito. - Buquir

You can't be sure now, you're just a kid. It's not an easy life, you know. It's going to complicate yours for sure. Maybe it's just a phase. - Dean

Coming out is a difficult stage. - Mel Beckham

It begins with a single step, a single step away and out of the closet, a departure from fear towards the terminus of acceptance and happiness. - Takeshi

Lisanin na ang aparador! Linisin na ang closeta! Lumabas ka na! Isa kang malaking dumi sa closeta! - Echoserita

Dumarating at darating ang panahon na hindi mo na maitatago ang katotohanan at kusa na lang itong sisingaw. -Edgar Portalan

It’s hard to be in the closet; almost everyone went through that, and from what I know, and experienced, your FAITH and prayer can help. - Von Draye

Sige na! Tanggap ko na. Ako na ang nag-out due to boredom. - Nimmy

So I can basically say that I am out, comfortable with my own color.... - Justinfinite

Ngayon na nabawasan na ang aking mga sikreto, pakiramdam ko ay nabunutan ako ng tinik na matagal ng nakabaon sa aking lalamunan. - Mu[g]en

I am quite uncertain of what it could be, but I am sure that it would now be less pretentious—a bit more real. - Thomasian Psychologist

Now that I live the life an openly gay man – my countenance is just a lot more relaxed – which I think contributes to my inward sense of being beautiful. - Lord Fernandez

-----O-----

Thank you girls sa mga Major Bongga nyong words! I really enjoyed the orgy. Until next time. Vavooo!

The Son Will Come Out

2010-08-31T14:33:00.000-07:00

[This is Lyka Bergen's contribution to The-orgy]

I dont even know what a 'bakla' was. As a kid, I used to play Jackstone and its Chinese version and was very good at it challenging my cousins Geraldine and Laura.

While my brothers and boy cousins play Jolens, I chose to play Chinese Garter with all the girl neighbors. I played Piko rather than making a toy truck out of milk cans. And I chose carrying a basket like going to the market over shooting a basket with a heavy orange ball. But, was it really a choice? I thought I was just being me and do things I enjoy.

As I get a little bit older, the teasing begins. I dont understand why people in the neighborhood were picking on me. Those people I dont even know. I remember asking my mom one night of why do they do that."Because you are different" she replied. I still didn't understand.

One afternoon, everybody in the clan was in our compound for a gathering. My uncle from Cebu came to visit us. He offered to bring all the boys to watch the movie, King Kong. I was so excited and so ready to go and felt sorry for Geraldine and Laura who cannot come. Until..... that Uncle told me that I'm not coming. "You're not a boy, are you?".

With tears, I ran looking for my mom crying out, "Im a boy!" and told her of what happened. She got angry. Towing me to see that intolerant Uncle but to no avail, he and the boys have already left. Mom tried to pacify me with a promise of us watching King Kong the next day but it didnt help my wailing. Cousins Geraldine and Laura grabbed my hand and led me to one corner. Then, right there at that moment, I understood what was really going on.

That was my first ever rejection as being gay. I so hated that moment that it led me to the thought that being 'different' is not a good thing. I tried not to be 'different' from then on but for some reasons I still cannot hide it. More teasing. More Rejections as i grow older. I tried more to stop it by denying what I feel, and not showing to other people who I am inside. I learned the art of pretending and like playing Jackstones, I was good at it.

Because of my bad childhood experiences as a Power Puff Girl, I turned out to become Spidey, hiding my true identity with an awkward mask. I opted coming out only to the members of The League of Extraordinary Very Gentle-Men who I think can understand me. It started with my very good friend, Plastic Man (Mama O) when we were in College. He kept on asking me who is this new guy friend I am always with. I told him, "He's my boyfriend". Those were my first ever coming-out words. From Plastic Man to Batman, my coming out was spilled to everyone in the group, who themselves shared their own stories too. I chose them because they are like me. People who are different, like my Mom's description of me when I was a child.

Today, despite of his different kinda powers, Spidey is still scared and wounded deep inside. Like his friend's Superman's Kryptonite, close-minded people making monkey out of him will cause him pain and weakness. So he chooses to continue to hide from the majority, including his own Family (whom he thinks doesn't need to know for they knew already).

Not a good defense, but the great Freud will comprehend. And yes, he still believes that the son will come out..... tomorrow!

Who Are We?

2010-08-27T21:23:00.000-07:00

With all this rehashing and parroting of ideas that ABS-CBN is doing, I view Philippine TV as a vast wasteland of unoriginal and uninspired concepts. Mostly copied from the Western spectrum, ABS-CBN TV shows humiliate us Pinoys in a major major way.

First, there was Noah....

.... a murky copy of James Cameron's Avatar.

Then they are bringing us Idol....

... to the likeness of Glee.

And recently announced their newest TV Show.... Imortal

Giving us vampires and werewolves that we've seen in Twilight.

Where is the Pinoy Ingenuity? Where are the new generation of Mars Ravelo? Do we always have to pattern our Art with what is new and successful in the Western World? How can we be noticed and be respected if we keep on mimicking them? Lets try to be us, as we are, for a change, showing what we've really got, not for them, but for ourselves. We are more than Imitators. Pls lang!

Lets learn from Japan. They gathered a little bit of every nice things from others, braid them all together, add their own little twist, and call it their own. The Anime and Takeshi's Castle are examples. And now look! Who is aping them straight off?

----O----

“You've gotta be original, because if you're like someone else, what do they need you for?” -Bernadette Peters

The Next Majorettes!

2010-08-24T18:09:00.000-07:00

This was stolen from Fuchsiaboy's Multiply. The Mega Magazine's editorial page spells W-O-W! The five MAJORettes in Norman Noriega's have the Major Major Ooomph for the next year's clash. Each is a good contender to continue the fight that our V has started.

But the Major Major problem is... are they Pinays? If they are, then go and glow na! I adore them ha! I will keep the styling for the pageant, head to toes, especially the hair. Major Major love it talaga, Sir!

I can't wait for a modern Bb. Pilipinas who looks like this. Ines Ligron will envy us. Tita Stella has 2 more years, I heard. If I were to replace her, I will go for this look. I love and respect the conservative Maria Clara but lets be rational. It's a major major mistake to send her to Miss Universe nowadays. It's absolutely not for her. It's for SISA! Pls lang!

Major! Major!

2010-08-23T23:32:00.000-07:00

"I cannot bring to mind any major mistake made at all in my 22 years of existence. With proper guidance and direction from my family and friends, I emerged as who I am today. No regrets. No major mistake so far. I am fortunate to have these people around me and I thank them for that."

I believe that was her point. But the delivery was tacky and incoherent. This is always our problem... a MAJOR... MAJOR problem! But to penetrate the final battle, we need the allure and the grace such as hers. So, I still say... she did good! Pls lang. Bow!

Rita's Secret

2010-08-23T00:37:00.000-07:00

Her name is Rita. She's our assistant at work. I love working with her. Every time I ask a favor from her, she will do it without any complaints or alibis. And she always wear a smile on her face, regardless of how swamped we are at work.

I found out she has two other jobs other than what we have together. I wonder how can she manage to do it. Time management and Perseverance were her reply. She said she just wish she earns as much as I do so she can just keep one job but the need requires her to hang on to three.

She earns half of my salary as an assistant but she will always be the one to bring me food and buy me chocolates and coffee. She will tell me some stories about her son back in the Philippines. She whines of how expensive Levi's 501 nowadays. "$60 for a pair of jeans? That's ridiculous!" . I will smile when she does that, thinking of my Seven For All Mankind jeans (which most of them don't fit no more for gaining weight from her Adobo, Kare Kare and Kit Kats during break times).

Today, she showed me pictures of her new constructed house in Alabang. It was a beautiful modern house. The house I dreamt of having. It's a 5-room 2-level house with a stunning Japanese garden. All that came out of my mouth seeing the pics was "Wow!".

I asked her how much did she spare for this amazing house. She replied coyly: 14 million pesos. I didnt allow the 'Wow' out of my mouth this time. I remember she works 3 jobs and she deserves having this. She lost her husband long time ago. And she did this all by herself? I thought to myself, I cannot afford building this house in 3 years like the way she did. Did she win the Lotto? Well, if she did, why is she still working with us?

"All of my hard work was for this house. One more year and i'll not be working hard for the Money any more" she reckons. Her son will be graduating next year. Then she said: "When he finishes college next year... he will find a job and HE WILL BE LIKE YOU!"

I was a little bit embarrassed and surprised of how Rita see me as a model for her son. The high regards she has for me. I told her with all honesty : "No, Rita. I hope your son will not turn out to be like me. I hope he will emerge to be like YOU"

All she replied was: "Ikaw naman. Joker ka talaga!".

I didnt know if she did get my point. She was carrying fresh linens and some cleaning soap heading towards the room of an elderly Caucasian full of poop. And I thought, I wish I can be like her.

-----O-----

Flaming enthusiasm, backed up by horse sense and persistence, is the quality that most frequently makes for success. -Dale Carnegie

LTE's Choice For Miss U 2010

2010-08-19T21:22:00.000-07:00

Mga Bakla! I am sure you've watched the Miss U Preliminaries na via the internet. Let's compare notes! Daliiii! If Mama O and I were to judge this year's Miss U, this will be the outcome: (Sorry absent si Ekra, Project Runway kasi ang priority nya).

(In Alphabetical Order)

Evening Gown:

Top 5: Ireland, Japan, Philippines, Russia, Venezuela

Top 10: Australia, Colombia, France, Peru, Uruguay

Top 15: Dominican Republic, Mexico, Norway, South Africa, Trinidad and Tobago

Swimsuit:

Top 5: Australia, Colombia, Ireland, Philippines, Russia

Top 10: Czech Republic, Ghana, Jamaica, Mexico, Trinidad and Tobago

Top 15: Canada, Dominican Republic, Haiti, Spain,Venezuela

Dark Horses: China, Greece, Israel, Thailand, Uruguay

Powerhouse Break: India, Puerto Rico, Sweden, USA and Eastern Europe

And now, for the over-all result:

Top 15: Dominican Republic, Haiti, Jamaica, Japan, Peru

Top 10: France, Mexico, Trinidad and Tobago, Uruguay, Venezuela

LTE's 2010 Top 5 (minus the Interview):

4th runner-up: Colombia

3rd Runner Up: Australia

2nd Runner Up: Philippines

1st Runner Up: Russia

Miss Universe 2010: Ireland

LTE's Miss Universe 2010: Miss Ireland

Congratulations Miss Ireland! You are LTE's Choice to win the crown! Good Luck!

Kayo? Sinetch ang mga Choices nyo? Goooo!

The Tunes

2010-08-19T15:59:00.000-07:00

When I was cleaning my room today, I unearthed hundreds of Music CD's from my closet. I thought, what am I going to do with these? I have iTunes and no longer own a stereo system. These are all going to fall to bits.... like my own small collection of those music cassette tapes long time ago.

I didnt see how the future of technology will change so drastically. I used to think that my CD collection is a treasure to uphold. A lifetime of music. The soundtrack of my Life. That is no longer the case. With everything in my iTunes... they are now abandoned stuff waiting to rot.

I lost my CD virginity to The Church. Their Starfish is the oldest in my collection. It was given to me as a gift. Now, it reminds me of my New Wave days.

Though, I havent touched the CD for a very long time, I still listen to "Hotel Womb" and "Under The Milky Way" once in awhile when I hit that iTunes shuffle button. They still rock, I thought! And yes, you will never forget your first time.

But Starfish was not the first CD I purchased for myself. It was this:

I owned a cassette tape of this Enya's Watermark, purchasing it after hearing "Orinoco Flow" in Ford's Supermodel of the World - Philippines contest. But I purchased the CD version in Dubai with my first ever paycheck along with a Sony Discman. (Wow! The word 'Discman', no longer in our young ones' vocabulary). I'm so proud owning one long time ago, listening to Tita Enya while waiting for the bus. Sooo baduy nowadays!

Owning a CD collection was a bad investment. The culprit, this one:

Chill Out Music was sooo cool back then. The Cafe Del Mar compilation was a hit. I first came across with this from a chat friend in MIRC (remember this, guys? #gaymanila, #discreetguys?) . We were talking about Music. I told him I soo fancy Kinobe's Slip Into Something More Comfortable which i heard at Beachcomber Bar in Boracay back then. He said, i should try the Cafe del Mar series. So I did.... piloting Cafe Del Mar 6 and fell in love with it immediately.

At that time, volume "Seis" was the most recent one.... I bought the earlier versions from "Uno" to "Cinco" from paycheck to paycheck. And every year on, "Siete" "Ocho" "Nueve" as they were released. My Cafe del Mar love has died on "Diez" for my music genre has evolved from Chill out to Buddha Bar series and eventually to World Music.

My Cafe Del Mar's, Buddha Bar's, Man Ray's and Putumayo's started my CD collection. From then on, I became a CD addict. Buying a couple if I have the chance. Virgin was my favorite store. But when iTunes and MP3's came, it all slipped away.

My last CD purchased:

Sigur Ros' "Takk". It means, Thanks! ......Good Night! I'll stack you all up in one corner and think what to do with you next. My iPod smiles humming.... Pls lang!

Miss Halloween

2010-08-18T01:12:00.000-07:00

Britain's Next Top Model goes Horror. Grabbing photographer Matthew Brindle to do the shoot. Impressive photos I would say. Modelling, So-So.

This photo is my favorite: Tiffany and the Axe

But the judges opted for this one of Olivia's as their best

The face looks stunningly haunting but the leg bothers me.

Kate Mossy, Joy was called next after Olivia

Judges thought its the scariest. I dont think so. More of S&M, maybe.

Kirsty's stab wound looks glamorous. I kinda like it. Model-wise, I think she's the best this week while Charlotte's Poltergeist didnt amaze me at all. It's the photographer's favorite thus a plus and saved her from elimination.

This one I thought will stop someone in their tracks,

But Alisha was a disappointment. She looks more scary than scared.

The Bottom Two:

Photo-wise, I fancy this one. I love how the photographer did garnish this pic but Nicola (my fave to win) didnt do justice to the abstraction. And yes, I agree, she looks like she has a 10 out of 10 toothache with matching 1 out 10 headache and was sent home.

But this one should have been booted out:

Amelia looks terrible here. The arms look short and flabby. The face awful. She looks like Ana Abiera (ka-love team ni Jestoni noon). But she has the best catwalk among the remaining models. Thus, given a lifeline.

Since they sent Nicola out of the house, I'll go for Joy this time. Pls lang!

This Is Not Fanny

2010-08-17T00:23:00.000-07:00

Fanny Serrano in TARIMA:

Viva Bakla! I smell URIAN!

"Opportunity is just success looking for a place to happen". - Greg Hickman

I Love Miss Russia!

2010-08-15T11:51:00.000-07:00

On this one....

Lumiliyab Ang Venus

2010-08-14T01:58:00.000-07:00

Miss Universe Next Top Model.

4th Runner Up is.....

[INDIA]

3rd Runner Up is......

[COLOMBIA]

2nd Runner Up is.....

[TANZANIA]

1st Runner Up is......

[TRINIDAD and TOBAGO]

And the WINNER......

[PHILIPPINES]

Sinasabi ko na nga ba.... babawi ang Lola Venus ninyo sa Swimsuit shoot! O diva? Bongga ang gagah? Kabog sila sa katawan ng bruha! Parang nag-slide pero pose pa rin! WTG Venus. Mabuhay ka! (Chaka nga lang yung shoes mo! Galing ba yan kay Tita Stella? Look naman yung kay Miss Colombia. Dapat ganyan sana! Pls lang!)

Ibang level naman ang TandT ! Topless ang drama. Mahaba ang neck! Tse!

I feel so sorry sa mga girls who were not given an opportunity to pose ala Top Model. Ano ang nangyari? Bat nagkagayan? Wala ng budget? Like the ones here:

Ecuador, Lebanon, and Thailand

But still... its not an excuse. Some of them pulled it off naman! Like:

Venezuela and Ireland

Basta... the best yung kay Lola V. Walang bias. Taraaaay! May pahabol ang Lola. "Kung mahaba ang neck ni Trinidad and Tobago, kaya ko rin yan alang alang sa mga Baklang Pilipino! Oh? Say nyo?"

Venus Wears Orange

2010-08-12T00:58:00.000-07:00

Lumabas na ang Gown ng Lola Venus ninyo! Orange ang kulay! Eto sya:

Aaaay! Very Cumbra! Mediocre! Very 5 yrs ago. Walang ka drama drama. Galing ba to ng Colombia or Divisoria? At ang shoes! Galing Qatar na naman? Pero dont worry, babawiin na lang sa rampa ng Lola Venus ninyo! Tingnan nyo naman ang pose. Wonder Woman ang emote! Old Fashioned kasi si Tita Stella. Nakaka-inis na.

LTE's TOP 5 Evening Gowns- Ms U 2010

Colombia, Mexico, Venezuela, India, Ireland

Worst 5 - 2010

Haiti, Norway, Romania, Denmark, Belgium

Ang Ms U na toh talagah... Medyo kulang sa Fashion! Kainis! Kahit ang hinihintay nating si Miss Japan... medyo sablay. Versace ba to? Di namin feel! Wiz controversy kazee at Pls lang Ines, Di bagay sa skin tone ni Miss Japan itets. Di sya si Nicole Kidman. Hay naku!

Good Luck na lang kay Lola V. Pls lang!

Miss Venus is from Earth

2010-08-07T02:17:00.000-07:00

Arrival Photo ng Lola Venus ninyo!

Matronic ang dress ha! Ano ba yan Mama Stella? Wiz trendy! Kainis! Miss Qatar ang tela! Hintayin na lang natin ang Bikini shoot nya. I think dyan sya babawi. Good luck to her. Pls lang! 10 yrs na rin tayong naghihintay na makapasok man lang. Ginawa na ngang from 10 to 15, di pa rin! Gosh!

The Art of Dance and Editing

2010-08-04T03:02:00.000-07:00

Anyone into The LXD (Legion of Extraordinaty Dancers)? This is my favorite episode, Duet. Watch after the Ad.

The video is from Hulu. I dunno if you guys outside the US can watch it. Just try, maganda sya. Sana makakagawa din ako nito. As a videographer and not as a dancer. Kaka-inspire. Pls lang!

The Mole

2010-08-01T13:22:00.000-07:00

I am starting to believe that a facial mole in between an eye and an ear is maswerte and meant for greatness na talaga, especially in males sa Pinoy showbiz, at least. The mole is a mark of luck. Sino-sino ang mga Markado sa Pinoy showbiz ngayon?

The "Then":

Richard Gomez

Tall, Dark and Handsome. Yan ang Goma. Inaabangan sa Palibhasa Lalake noon, tinitilian sa Wating, napahanga nya tayo sa Dahas at napa-wow sa TV Commercial nyang Bench (Rowing Ad). Remember ko noon ang salita ng isang matalik na kaibigan kong baklang si Lloyda: "Kung 'the greatest Pinoy Matinee Idol' ng mga babae si Aga Mulach, Si Richard Gomez naman ang No. 1 sa mga Bakla!" Agree ako sa kaibigan ko!

The "Now":

Piolo Pascual

The first time i saw this guy sa pelikula, tumibok na ang puso ko. Batang PX noon with Zsa Zsa and Patrick Garcia, may isang gwapong artistang extra. Sino sya? Aba hinintay ang credits para malaman talaga. Si Piolo Pascual pala sya. Ngayon, Ultimate Papa ng Bayan na sya! Love ko pa rin sya! Walang kokontra!

The "Next One":

Derek Ramsay

Una ko syang na notice sa Oxygen Print Ad. Di ko pa knowing ang nemsung nya noon until nakita ko sya in person. Sa Boracay noon, Sa talipapa, si Geraldine, ang bakla kong kaibigan, biglang napa-tulala. "Girl! Si Derek!" "Sino?" "Ayan sa harap mo, dumadaan" "OMG! Akin sya! Pero sino ba sya?" "Ang Print Ad model ng Oxygen!" "Aaaay! Derek pala ang nemsung nya? Akin na sya! Promise!" Pero may sexing babaeng bitbit ang Derek noon. "Aaay! Sayo na lang sya!"

Markado ang Derek Ramsay, kaya I am pretty sure sisikat at sisikat pa si Papa! May balita pa ngang insecure raw ang Papa Piolo sa kanya! Angelica, maswerte ka! Go lang ng go, bruha! Habang nasa-iyo pa sya!

------O-----

So now ang tanong, sino ang sa mga batang male artista ang susunod sa mga yapak ng mga Papang markadong itetch? Sya kaya?

The "Future":

Matteo Guidecelli

As of now, di ko pa sya masyadong kilala. Di naman ako nanonood ng Agua Bendita. Pero, sikat raw sya according sa mga balitang natatangap ko from Pinas. Matteo, dahil markado ka, pagbutihan mo. Ikaw ang batang Dalai Lama ng Pinoy Showbiz. Hihintayin namin ang pagka super sikat, mo. Good Luck! Pero pwede bang palitan mo ang showbiz name mo? Sounds like a kind of Pasta kasi. Your fellow bagets male stars want to eat you tuloy. Sige ka. Pls lang!

(PS. Si Ekra may pimple in between his left eye and left ear. Ano naman kaya ang ibig sabihin nito?)

"Melai"

2010-07-27T22:42:00.000-07:00

"Melisa Cantiveros, 21, General Santos Ciiity!"

Habang may make-up, may Pag-asa. Wag mawalan ng Pag-asa. Kahit galit pa si Noynoy sa PAGASA. Kaya, hope lang ng hope mga bakla! At mag-Effort pa ng bonggang bongga! Gayahin si Melai.

BEFORE:

NOW:

Bravo sa mga tao behind the shoot. Question: Involved ba si Belo dito? Please lang!

Project Runway ala Dexter

2010-07-23T04:00:00.000-07:00

We are excited. Project Runway 8, coming na!

But wait, the teaser is so "Dexter" ha!

Watch:

Compare:

Lifetime ha! Gaya-gaya! Pls lang! Pero, OK lang.... watch pa rin! July 29th na ang Premiere! Go lang ng go! For more info on Project Runway 8, check here.

Magkaribal Sotto

2010-07-21T16:58:00.000-07:00

Inumpisahan kasi ng ingeterrang Ate Sienna, kaya eto nakapag-blog tuloy ako. Oo, Magkaribal Fan po ako! (Idamay na rin si Mama O). Inaabangan sa YouTube, wala kasi kaming TFC. Poorisima Pascual ang lola ninyo!

Kahit obvious na kung saan papunta ang storya, sige pa rin! Kakatuwa kasi ang awayang Vera at Victoria; Effective ang Bea; Ang cute ni Enchong! ; at Fashion-Fashion ang thema! Kaya watch ang mga bruha.

Ayan! Ang Greta ninyo. Kahit wala na sa eksena. Diva-divahan pa rin ang drama.

"Yaya! Amoy chlorox ang panyong ito! Itapon! Go!"

Suggestion lang sana:

1. Dapat gawing supermodel ala Ria Bolivar ang role ni Gigi (Bianca Manalo)! Natural ang acting ng Bb. Pilipinas-Universe na to ha! Pag-aagawan kunwari ni Vera and Victoria. Divisoria Girl turned high fashion Mannequin. Magandang side-story line yan, mga Bakla!

2. More of Bea-Enchong-Erich friendship! Yung kumakain sa Jollibee together na moment! Parang ganyan, Davu? Barkadahan ala Tabing Ilog style. Masaya man at malungkot na scenes, clique pa rin!

3. Gawing spy ni Victoria sa Vera Couture si Nina Ricci Alagao! Notice ko kasi parang one-liner lang ang role ng Binibini-after-Miriam natin. Dapat bigyan ng magandang role itong bruhang to. Sayang ang shiny nyang buhok!

4. Mag Fashion Magazine publisher na lang si Chloe (Erich) dahil di naman sya magaling mag-design di ba? Ala Mega or Preview na calibre. Or mag-model pwede na rin! Dito makikita ni Vera na talented din pala ang anak nyang adopted. (Anak kaya sya ng characters nina Arlene Mulach at John Arcilla? Wag na! Pls lang! Over na kung ganyan!)

5. Gawing ala Bryanboy manamit ang role ng baklang spy-designer ni Vera! Or di kaya ala Jujin Samonte or Toxic Boy na dating. Don't deny, dumadami na ang population nila! Para mas bongga, di ba? At para naman may aabangan tayo.

6. More Fashion Shows! at simple na stage lang sana. Yung black and White na backdrop at di masyadong kukurtinahing "bongga" dahil baduy ang kinalabasan. It reminds me of German Moreno's shows kasi. Eeew!

7. Introduce a Supermodel character. (Yung away awayin si Bianca!). Ala Naomi dapat. Diva-divahan. Pala-yosi. At please lang, dapat Skinny noh! Sino kaya ang bagay dito? Wilma Doesnt? Maggie Wilson? or Pokwang?

8. More Pinoy fashion celebrities as guest stars. (at patayin na ang role ni Renee Salud. Chos lang!) Sotto? Laurel? Moreno? or Eddie Badeo? Aaaay!

9. Mention naman sana nila ang sakit ng character ni Arlene Mulach. Curious lang kasi ako. Parang na Heart Attack, tapos nag Seizures, tapos labas agad sa hospital. Diabetes siguro, pwede pa. Ching lang at baka magalit si Aga.

10. More Fashion and more chi-chi Dresses! Ipakita ang design process ni Victoria and Jelai… their inspiration and how the dresses were made. Like kung ano ang ganap sa mga scenes this week, sana may corresponding na bonggang bonggang dress inspired by the events. May tele-novela ka na, may project runway ka pa! Di ba masaya?

Yan! Yun lang! Sana mabasa ito ng ABS-CBN. Ate Charo... maganda ka! (Charo Ronquillo, gagah! Not the Santos-Concious! Charing!) FYI, Pangako Sa Yo pa ang last Tele-Novela na inabangan ko. The Claudia-Amor war of words is back sa katauhan nina Vera at Victoria. More Amor Powers sa Magkaribal! Pls lang!

The Beauty Pageant Is Over

2010-07-18T01:29:00.000-07:00

OK, accept ko na. I am no longer Megan Young na. Kaya....

From this:

To this na:

I should be age-appropriate na talaga. Promise!

100 and Maximo Oliveros, Restored

2010-07-17T00:44:00.000-07:00

I love Cinemalaya's TVCs.

Especially this one for 2010, "Casket"

and this one too: "Maximo"

Mabuhay ang mga tao behind Cinemalaya! Bravo!

Ahas!

2010-07-09T01:54:00.000-07:00

Sino ang takot sa ahas this time?

Nothing to do with the ahas, love to know that Adechike is safe!!! But this season SYTYCD's clear winner has to go bye-bye because of an injury. Goodbye Alex and hope to see you next season!

SYTYCD Rants

2010-07-07T22:45:00.000-07:00

Our Favorite SYTYCD Dancers, Alex and Adechicke were supposed to dance together this week in our favorite routine, Bollywood! That should have been amazing. But because of Alex's injury, Ade danced with a replacement partner instead.

He was awesome giving us 'unintentional' African twist to Bollywood but the judges didnt like it. They're kinda bias in my opinion. They have their favorites already and gosh, they are into pa-cute-ness ha. Especially that lolang baklang Nigel Lithgow na yan! Kainis ang pustiso. Chos!

Nice that our fave host, Cat Deeley saved Ade with those leaning comments. (At ang Lolang Nigel, defensive pa ang leche! Why dont he compare his fave Jose's (gwapo kasi) Bollywood to Ade's performance? Mas magaling yung kay Ade noh! Tse nya!)

By rule, Alex is surely in the bottom 3 tomorrow for not performing this week. But we are 99% sure that they will let him stay. I voted for Adechike. If he ends up at the bottom 3 tomorrow, there's a big chance that the bwisiting judges will let him go. Pls lang ha! Tse!

(Sorry girls, I cant find a video of Adechike's Bollywood dance. Maybe it's too early for someone to DL it at this time. I'll leave you with last season's Bollywood routine instead. With my fave that season, .... cute and sexy, Jason. Here it is:).

Teng's Limbunan

2010-07-07T01:27:00.000-07:00

Fellow blogger Gutierrez "Teng" Mangansakan II's debut film is one of the 10 films to be shown in the 6th Cinemalaya Film Festival this July. Starring Tita Techie and Papa Joem, we are excited for you, Teng!

Limbunan Trailer from Bidadali House on Vimeo.

Synopsis:
Set in 1989, the film captures the ritual motions of the women in a family preparing for the wedding of 16-year-old Ayesah who has been betrothed to a man she barely knows. As Maguindanaon tradition dictates, she will be kept from public view in her private quarters –limbunan— where she will be prepared, readied, and pampered for her wedding.

As preparations for her union is underway, Ayesah is reunited with her childhood tutor Maguid who returns to the village as a militiaman after an absence of five years, reawakening Ayesah’s past memory of childhood infatuation.

Throughout Ayesah’s confinement her precocious and rebellious eight-year-old sister Saripa becomes her eyes to the world beyond her room. Her mother Amina keeps her composure despite the fact her husband sleeps with his second wife half of the time, finding solace in the belief that it is both her religious and familial duty to be an obedient wife.

Ayesah’s aunt Farida is tasked to ensure that she is prepared for the wedding. However, Farida’s dark past challenges Ayesah’s resolve finding herself choosing between love and loyalty to tradition and family.

Premiere will be on July 10 at the Cultural Center of the Philippines. Wish we can attend to support you Teng. We are so proud of you. Go lang ng go! Congratulations and good luck!

Looks Is Not Enough

2010-07-04T05:30:00.000-07:00

Why do models kill themselves?

Viveka B. is not alone. Models committing suicides nowadays is periodic like Paris or Lohan getting arrested. But why oh why? They look gorgeous and most of us want to be them!

Ruslana Korshunova, 20 (R.I.P. 2008) Suicide by Fall

Tom Nicon, 20 (R.I.P. 2010) Suicide by Fall

Daul Kim, 20 (R.I.P. 2009) Suicide by Hanging

Ambrose Olsen, 24 (R.I.P. 2010) Suicide by Hanging

Noemie Lenoir, 30 (Suicide Attempt by Overdosing 2010)

We will cry.. "Sayang". But well, they dont have everything eh. Beauty is not all that matters. Humanap ka ng pangit at ibigin mong tunay! (Aaay! Saan galing yun?) Pls. lang!

Threesome

2010-07-01T00:48:00.000-07:00

Sabi nga nila, kapag may aklat sikat! Kaya go na sa launching ng Threesome by Grey Matter Publishing on July 10, 2010. 4-7PM at theRoom. Tatlong aklat para sa ating mga Pinoy Girlaloos! Oo, para sa atin ito! Kaya go lang ng go!

1. The Wet Book: Stories from the Bathhouse

2. Chronicles of E

3. Dear Migs: Letters to Manila Gay Guy

There will be performances at the launch. (Ano kayang klaseng performances itrek? Tinikling or Sakuting? Charing!). Can I sing?

See You there! Everybody is welcum. Pa-mhin man or hinde. Basta ang di makapunta'y...... Pangit! Pls lang ha!

Ekra's Debut Collection

2010-06-28T21:38:00.000-07:00

O ayan, Si Ekra Tan nag fashion debut na ang lukarette! From LTE Fashion to SF Fashion. Congratulations Sis! More Power. Pls. lang!

8 pieces in 8 days. The LTE way. Go lang ng go si Bakla. And guess the guest? Jay Nicholas Sario of Project Runway. Viva Ekra Lynn. Mama O says.. "Tse!" I say.. "Talunin ang Vera Couture!"

Aljur

2010-06-23T02:15:00.000-07:00

There he goes again... my Next Piolo or my Younger Piolo Version or my Piolo-na-di-Bading or something to that effect.... for a Kelly-Kelly shot! Bravo!

Missoni

2010-06-20T20:34:00.000-07:00

Missoni Menswear Spring 2011. I Love! Pls lang!

Wavin' Flag

2010-06-16T02:33:00.000-07:00

Kelan pa kaya tayong mag wave ng flag natin sa World Cup? Or kahit sa ano mang Team Sports Event? Possible kaya to ever?

Hanggang sa 'Suntok' lang ata tayo at walang 'Sipa'.

Or sa kanya na lang kaya tayo aasa? Pls. lang!

Everybody But Me

2010-06-10T00:46:00.000-07:00

Before I go to sleep, I dream.

When Im already asleep, I dream more.

And when I wake up, I look for a cigarette

Then the usual, saying hello to Mac

Without him, I'm lost

Gosh! I soo miss Jack, Kate, and Hurley already.

But wait! Alejandro, Fernando, and Roberto are here,

On stilettos ... hot like Cabo, Mexico

Dancing gaga with the next Madonna

But I love Sabel more.

And Tina, who revives Sabel's career

In a super fashionista way.

DP's Red didn't surprise us

Neither did The Yellows and the Blacks

But the cager at the proclamation did.

Where is Josh....

Halloway's Sawyer? I miss too.

And Ben... not the Cabrera, maker of Sabel.

Now I'm really lost.

Just need to write something

Or else Kiks will mow me down

The King Kong of Hong Kong,

This is for you!

Regards to Aaron!

It's such a beautiful night!

Everybody is alive!

But me.

It's time for my Vitamin Water

while Mama O has her Smart Water.

Thank you Glaceau!

I Wonder.....

2010-06-04T12:36:00.000-07:00

Can someone revive this song? Miley perhaps? Pwede na rin si Charice. Or kahit isang segment na sa Glee!

Remember ko lang dahil ang saya saya nila dito.

Lost No More

2010-05-25T01:25:00.000-07:00

Good bye Lost. It was a great ride. Goodbye!

Uncle Boonmee and the Emir

2010-05-23T14:34:00.000-07:00

Cannes 2010 Best Film is from Thailand: Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Life by Apichatpong Weerasethakul.

"Ghosts are not attached to places, but to people... to the living".

But wait!..... (with no connections to Uncle Boonmee) How was Chito Rono's full-length Musical Film? Lumabas na ba to? Kumita ba?

Well again, congratulations to Thailand's Apichatpong! (and to Chito for giving us something new).

LTE's Vogue-Philippines

2010-05-21T03:58:00.000-07:00

Discussion ng mga Bakla: Kung biglang naging Manny Villar - rich ka at nasasa-iyo ang Franchise ng Vogue- Philippines, sino ang i-feature mo as cover ng debut issue ng Fashion Magazine na kokontra sa Mega at Preview?

Of course, syempre dapat Pinay! Vogue-Philippines nga eh. Mahirap anetch? Kung LTE lang ang may power..... sampu lang ang pinagpipilian namin. Eto sila in random order:

1. Melanie Marquez: Suggestion ni Ekra. Gosh ha, ang tanda nya na. magmukhang matronicougar ang datesh ng Vogue-Philippines nyan. But Ekra insists. We willl concentrate raw on The History of Philippine Fashion sa first ever issue. True, Mimilanie is a big part of it naman. Kaya pasok ang gagah! Gawing trendy lang raw ang make-up! Pwede na!

2. Charo Ronquillo and Charlene Almarvez (embracing each other sa cover, nude): Suggestion ko naman to para young ang dating and pang international pa. (Eh si Mimilanie, Miss International naman ah? Ching!). It will set the standard na di celebrity magazine ang Vouge-Philippines but truly more on Fashion and Glamour. It should spell ART and not ARTista!

3-4. Or maybe just Charlene without Charo or vice-versa! I am sure, kayang kaya nilang mag-isa! Bigyan pansin ang sariling atin!

5. Ruffa Gutierrez: Kawadjan Mae suggests. Well, pwede dahil si Ruffa ay all support naman sa ating mga local designers. At maganda naman ang bruha. But is she Chic enough? Wag lang syang magpa-sweet, OK na. In other words: Ruffa ala mode!

6. KC Concepcion: Ang Vogue-Philippines ay dapat pang masa din dahil ito ay para sa lahat ng mga Pinoy. Why not that Marian girl na lang kung pang masa man lang? Hello? Wala syang Class katulad ni KC. I remember ang first issue ata ng Mega Magazine ay si Tita Shawie ang cover. Well, KC's beauty will surely be a hit katulad ng Nanay nya! Say nyo?

7. Alessandra de Rossi: Kung artista lang naman ang i-cover, dapat payat na at mukhang model naman, sabi ni Mama O. Eh di si Alex na! Davu? Aliw na aliw pa naman kami sa beauty nya. Kahit half-half ang loka, pasok pa rin sya! At wag ka... para naman baklang-bakla ang ating first cover. Gooo!

8. Ria Bolivar: Do we need to explain why? Ang di naka-kakilala kay Ria ay isang walang kwentang baklaaa! Charoooot!

9. Cassie (Cassandra Ventura): Yep, that half-Pinoy singer, 1/4 Black, 1/4 Latino. She got the look of a model naman but... yeah, again, she's half. We want more home-grown sana as much as possible sa first-ever issue. She's to represent the true Pinay beauty dapat. Pero kakaiba ang beauty ni Cassie cassie, we'll see. Pwede na rin si Vanessa or Nicole but Cassie is still our best choice kung half-half lang naman ang pag-uusapan. Tse!

10. An Unknown: Para kakaiba. Pag-uusapan ng mga Pinoy Fashionistas na kung bakit sya? Dapat yung na discover sa Palengke or sa Surigao Beach, nagbebenta ng shells, someone like that. And it will create a big statement: Kahit sino ka man at kahit saan ka man galing sa ating 7000 islands, you can be fashionable and stylish if you want to... the Pinoy way! Vogue!

-----O----

Never in our list: Marian Rivera!!!! Si Kris Aquino pwede pa... pero not sa debut issue. Medyo may pagka-baduy ang the new first lady of our country! Agree?

Kayo? Sino ang pipiliin nyo? Pls lang! Gandahan nyo!

The Pinoy Fashion Look

2010-05-16T01:08:00.000-07:00

Filipinos are everywhere!!! From Dubai to Chang Mai; Tokyo to Toronto; plus Mississippi .... and even Papua New Guinea! but internationally, they can never be seen in Fashion Magazines. Until 2010.... here we come:

Paolo Roldan (far right): Givenchy Ad Campaign 2010

Charlene Almarvez (far right): V Magazine

Charo Ronquillo: Glamour (US)

Sharina Gutierrez: Elle (US)

What's next? Sabayan si Monique? (Go Ekra! Go Ekra! Go!)

PS. Take note! Walang Mestiza or Mestizo churvalo kina Paolo, Charene, Sharina and Charo. Tama na muna ang mga half-half na yan! Pls lang!

Miss Sexy USA

2010-05-12T00:34:00.001-07:00

The official photos of Miss USA 2010 .......

Bastos ba or Winner?

Cheap ba or Sosyal?

Anong ma-say ng mga bakla? Aber?

-----O-----

LTE's favorite Photo goes tooooooo......

Kayang kaya ni Venus toh noh! Pls lang!

This One Is For Me

2010-05-11T03:47:00.000-07:00

----------------->>>

This one's for the lonely

The ones that seek and find

Only to be let down

Time after time

This one's for the torn down

The experts at the fall

Come on friends get up now

You're not alone at all

And this part was for him

This part was for him

Does he remember?

It comes and goes in waves,

This one's for the faithless

The ones that are surprised

They are only where they are now

Regardless of their fight

This one's for believing

If only for it's sake

Come on friends get up now

Love is to be made

And this part was for him

This part was for him

Does he remember?

It comes and goes in waves,

I am only led to wonder why

It comes and goes in waves

I am only led to wonder why

Why I try

This is for the ones who stand

For the ones who try again

For the ones who need a hand

For the ones who think they can

It comes and goes in waves,

I am only led to wonder why

It comes and goes in waves

I am only led to wonder why

Why I try

....O.....

Comes and Goes by Greg Laswell: Speaks to me so much like how The Mighty communicated with Abraham to kill his son.

Ang tanga ko talaga! But at least, I'd tried at nalaman ko. Well, it's time to get up now. A new Love is to be made! Pls lang!

Ojie Is Back

2010-05-07T00:16:00.000-07:00

We LOVE this Guy......

Mama, mama, paano ka ginawa?

We Are Fated To Pretend

2010-05-04T17:23:00.000-07:00

Jonsi (of Sigur Ros) covers MGMT's Time to Pretend . His take makes the song more meaningful, emotional, and somber yet beautiful. Listen:

Original:

Jonsi's Cover:

I was more into the rhythm with MGMT's original but Jonsi's affecting version made me examine the anatomy of the song. Social norms of Adulthood (specifically for young adults) versus the values of Childhood.

Well, its fun to be in the prime of your life... living the rock-star life, etc... yet the reality is, life as an adult can be overwhelming... You can be anyone you want, but at the end of the day everyone's the same. We became glamorous and careless. We flaunt what we have and what we have achieved yet deep inside we thought there's something wrong and when we do feel it, we pretend. We pretend that we're OK and do have some more 'fun', 'everything must run its course'.

But we can always go back... to Childhood where we used to pretend in a different way and to start off to achieve whatever it is lacking. But sadly, most of us chose to continue... to pretend as an adult and end up 'choking our vomit and that would be the end'.

Ang Pinoy nga Naman

2010-05-01T08:43:00.000-07:00

I woke up reading an email about Real Answers to questions in Filipino TV game shows.

OMG sumakit ang tyan ko sa kakatawa, esp. to #9!!!! Mabuhay ang mga Pilipino, because poor and not as educated most of us are, we are simply funny, genuine, resilient, and we never fail to make other people laugh and smile.

HENJOYYYY!!!

1. Q: "Ano sa Tagalog ang teeth?" A: "Utong!"

2. Q: "Kung ang light ay ilaw, ano naman ang lightning?" A: "Umiilaw!"

3. Q: "Kung vegetarian ang tawag sa kumakain ng gulay, ano ang tawag sa kumakain ng tao? A: "Humanitarian?"

4. Q: "Sina Michael at Raphael ay mga." A: "Ninja?"

5. Q: "Ano ang karaniwang kasunod ng kidlat?" A: "Sunog!"

6. Q: "Magbigay ng sikat na Willie." A: "Willie da pooh!"

7. Q: "Ang mga Hindu ay galing sa aling bansa?" A: "Hindunesia?"

8. Q: "Anong hayop si King Kong?" A: "Pagong!"

9. Q: "Magbigay ng mabahong pagkain." A: "Tae!" (di ba Mama O? chos!)

10. Q: "Saang bansa matatagpuan ang mga Canadians?" A: "Canadia!"

11. Q: "Kumpletuhin - Little Red." A: "Ribbon!"

12 Q: "Ano ang tinatanggal sa itlog bago ito kainin?" A: "Buhok?"

13. Q: "Magbigay ng pagkain na dumidikit sa ngipin." A: "Tinga!"

14. Q: "Anong oras kadalasang pinapatay ang TV?" A: "Pag balita?"

15. Q: "Ano ang tawag mo sa anak ng taong grasa?" A: "Baby oil?"

16. Q: "Saan karaniwang ginagawa ang mga sweets na ginagamit sa halu-halo?" A: "Sweetserland?"

17. Q: "Sinong higanteng G ang tinalo ni David?" A: "Godzilla?"

18. Q: "Ano ang mas malaki, itlog ng ibon o sanggol ng tao?" A: "Itlog ng tao!"

19. Q: "Anong S ang tawag sa duktor nag nago-opera?" A: "Sadista?"

20. Q: "Blank is the best policy." A: "Ice tea?"

21. Q: "Anong parte ng itlog ang masarap?" A: "Yung tangkay?"

22. Q: "Saan binaril si Jose Rizal?" A: "Sa likod!"

23. Q: "Fill in the blanks - Beauty is in the eye of the ____." A: "Tiger?"

24. Q: "Ano ang kinakain ng monkey-eating eagle?" A: "Saging!"

25. Q: "Kung ang suka ay vinegar, ano naman ang Inggles ng toyo?" A: "Baliw!"

26. Q: "Anong tawag mo sa kapatid ng nanay mo?" A: "Kamag-anak!"

27. Q: "Saan nakukuha ang sakit na AIDS?" A: "Sa motel?"

28. Q: "Kung ang H2O ay water, ano naman ang CO2?" A: "Cold water!"

29. Q: "Sinong cartoon charcater ang sumisigaw ng yabba dabba doo?" A: "Si scooby dooby doo?"

30. Q: "Heto na si kaka, bubuka-bukaka." A: "Operadang bakla?" (GO LYKA!!)

31. Q: "Ilan ang bituin sa American flag?" A: "Madami!"

32. Q: "Ano ang tawag mo sa taong isa lang ang mata?" A: "Abnormal!"

Run, Lola, Run!

2010-04-30T03:37:00.000-07:00

After watching the The Proposal Spoof, and the Snickers TV Ad, plus the SNL Promo take. Betty White is our newest LTE Gay Icon.

Meanwhile....

Both our own Lolas win Best Actress - URIAN (tie) for Brillante Mendoza's Lola. Congratulations!

"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter".

Age Is Just A Number

2010-04-21T05:01:00.000-07:00

FB Chat with Chamomile Te, my baklang Chinese friend from the Philly na mahilig manood ng TV.

Chamomile: Hanapan mo naman ako dyan!

Me: Ng ano?

Chamomile: Ng 'Kano ano pa?

Me: Puti?

Chamomile: Syempre Puti, gagah!

Me: Ikaw ang gagah! May itim din na 'Kano noh!

Chamomile: Ay! Meron?

Me: Tanga!

Me: Anong age ang type mo?

Chamomile: 20 to 40 something lang.

Me: Ayo mo ng 50's?

Chamomile: Kahit ano basta Hot!

Me: Anek?

Chamomile: Age is just a Number!

Me: Ang arte nito! Tse!

Tama si Chamomile, Kung hot ka, hot ka talaga, kahit 20 or 40+ ka pa. Kaya eto ang sayo Chamu! LTE's 2010 TV's Hottest Papables..... (syempre lahat "Kano" for Tsinito like you! Leche!)

20-Something Dreamboats:

Luke Grimes (Brothers and Sisters)

Beau Mirchoff (Desperate Housewives)

Tim Urban (American Idol)

Logan Huffman (V)

Jared Padalecki (Supernatural)

Chace Crawford (Gossip Girl)

30-Something Beefcakes:

Eric Mabius (Ugly Betty)

Jonathan Rhys Myers (The Tudors)

Ryan Kwanten (True Blood)

Ian Somerhalder (The Vampire Diaries)

Eric Dane (Grey's Anatomy)

Matthew Morrison (Glee)

40-Something Studmuffins:

James Denton (Desperate Housewives)

Matthew Fox (Lost)

Patrick Dempsey (Grey's Anatomy)

Josh Holloway (Lost)

David Boreanaz (Bones)

Rob Lowe (Brothers and Sisters)

Ayan! Mga Bakla... dapat Hotness! No matter what man ang age natin ngayon.... dapat may asim pa rin! Pero ang tanong: Pwede bang ma in-love si Tim 24 sa Hotness ni Patrick 44? Pls lang!

Brilliant

2010-04-19T20:22:00.000-07:00

Post-Daybreak. Its a new day.... watched Serbis... and it resuscitated my adoration for alternative cinema. Brillante is brilliant. My first from him. I am not disappointed.

It was not only because of Coco's hard triggered purplish weapon or his perfect patootie (minus the boils). Nor Kristopher King's soft-penile demonstration with that mixed-race bayot with boobs. Not even Lola Gina P's slap-Nora-in the-face acting. Maybe, it was more of Brillante's radical work. Everything just turned out remarkable.

His characters walk the building's labyrinthine corridors (with the style Gus Van Sant used in Elephant), symbolizing the complicated paths these souls take in life. The filthiness (ex. flooded restrooms) of the old movie house where they reside is a representation of their own impurities. Sabi nga ni Ate Gina: "Madaming aayusin sa sinehan na to!"

One of my fave scenes: The Sapatos scene with Lola G and Ate J.

Serbis is my kind of movie. Thanks Brillante Mendoza and to Here! Productions. More exquisite Pinoy Movies from you, Please (without the 'lang'!)

Daybreak

2010-04-18T02:28:00.000-07:00

Depress-depressan ako ngayon... Kakatapos ko lang napanood ang pelikulang Daybreak ni Direk Alix for the first time. Di ko akalain na papa-iyakin pala ako ng todo to the max nito. Ayoko na. Dinagdagan pa ni Noel Cabangon. Ayoko na talaga.

Bakit kasi may socio-economic gap pa? At may age gap? at may gap ang teeth nina Elton at Madonna? Bakit kasi nagpapa-apekto tayo dito at di na lang magmahalan ng bongga bongga? Bakit may aalis at bakit may maiiwan? Bakit dapat magkalayo? Bakit pwedeng magmahal ng dalawa? Bakit hindi na lang isa? Bakit importante ang career? Bakit importante din ang pag-ibig? Bakit tayo pinapapili pa?

Bakit nakaka-relate ako sa pelikulang ito? Bakit kaya umiyak ako ng todo todo? Ayoko na ha... pls lang!

Love Diet and Sexual Appetite

2010-04-13T05:17:00.000-07:00

After a month of sex and some "love", I'm gonna sit down tonight and listen to the muteness of passion.

I think I had too much. My heart is distended. I need to trim down my carbs of over-thinking affection and control the urge for naughty appetite.

It's time to start the diet. The diet of Love and Sex. Wish me luck!

What If.....

2010-04-09T03:15:00.000-07:00

What if you pack up your bags and go to Mt. Abu

and there you meet someone like you

What if he likes you and you like him too

and his odd and amusing story about his Lolo.

What if he starts to sing

and then you start believing

What if you forget everything

and he reminds you it's nothing.

What if he snaps and bites

and you feel no pain

What if he offers you candy delights

and not that castle in Spain

What if you unanticipatedly feel sunny

and all around you is joy.

and swiftly......

What if he asks you for money

for he sees himself as your new toy?

Hainaku!

2010-02-13T16:19:00.000-08:00

Konnichiwa! 18 years ago, he did this:

His name is Masahiro Motoki, my new Jowa.

Chos lang mga gagah! So Ive finished watching the 2009 Oscar winning film, Departures anoh, where he starred as Daiku, and I immediately fell in love with him na. Hainaku talagah.

Now he's 44 and those young photos dont really matter. Aging doesnt affect him that much. He's even more sexy and... cute! (So mga bakla, dont be scared of Aging. Just take care of that bilbil and achieve something cool, then you'll be fine).

Moshi-moshi! Look at him now (winning Best Actor at 2009 Asian Fim Awards for Departures):

..and in the film. (Cute cute nya talagah! )

Masahiro! Masahi-in mo nga ako! Pls lang!

R.I.P. McQueen

2010-02-11T12:11:00.000-08:00

Goodbye, Alexander (McQueen) the Great, Goodbye. 1969-2010

Project Runway LTE Season 6

2010-02-01T05:52:00.000-08:00

From Rio to Morocco. Amelia meets Charito Solis. Season Six na!!! Pls Lang! Let's start the show!!!

Designer A:

Designer B:

Designer C:

Designer D:

Vote na! Dont forget to rank your favorite designer from 1st to 4th or else your vote wont count. We appreciate criticisms. The more harsh the best. Please lang!

Oooops! We would like to remind you that Anonymity leads to Controversy. So please lang ha, if you want to vote as Anonymous, pls leave your name after your comment. Otherwise, chaka ka! Chos!

You Are Invited

2010-01-28T01:40:00.000-08:00

I Wanna Be Mark Wahlberg!

2010-01-27T01:53:00.000-08:00

OK OK. Adolfo Alix Jr. is making a movie called D' Survivors, about castaway male models. And guess who ang starring? Two of our fave male models pa ha. Leche!

Rocky Salumbides + Daniel Matsunaga

Di ba kaloka ito? Also starring.....

Alizon Undress (Ay! Andres pala) + Fabio Ide

Kaines talagah! At meron pa:

Don Mendoza + Lem Pelayo

Wala bang babae? Aaay! Ayoko na! Im sure may kababalaghang mangyayari sa Isla. (si Alix Jr pa). But wait....

Pls lang! Real Actors should play the parts sana. Pero ewan ko ba. Sayang ka Adolfo, sayang! Akala ko si Adela ang tunay mong artista. Charot.

Feeling kasi namin na this will turn out as another lousy Pinoy Gay Indie. (Gay-Themed nga ba?) But malay natin, ang mga Papa models na to ay isang Mark Wahlberg pala..... former Ck model + Oscar Nominee!

Yung Don Mendoza... feeling ko magaling.... sa kama! Goooo!

Karibal

2010-01-19T04:12:00.000-08:00

Sya ang bago kong karibal.....

Younger version ni Yul Servo. Pls lang!

The Lost Supper

2010-01-16T03:06:00.000-08:00

"The Lost Supper"

The Final Season of Lost is coming soon. And their first promo pic? The Lost Supper based on Da Vinci's The Last Supper with Locke their Jesus. Hmmm..... exciting!

But they were not the one who did this first noh! Remember....

"The Sopranos"

"House"

"Battlestar Galactica"

At di rin magpapahuli ang Fashion, davu? Remember these?

And the Photographers have their own covers na rin.

David LaChappele

Adi Nes

Bernard Benant

But our favorites are from:

Raoef Mamedov, Cui Xiuwen, and Renee Cox

Plus Birb Bird, Bart Simpson and Luke Skywalker as Jesus

If Philippine's Imagine Magazine were to ask Lyka Bergen to be Jesus in their Last Supper shoot, my 12 disciples would be: Piolo Pascual, Aljur Abrenica, Jake Cuenca, Victor Basa, Ron Morales, Brent Javier, Daniel Matsunaga, Derek Ramsay, Philip Younghusband, Zanjoe Marudo, Luke Jickain, and Rocky Salumbides. All wearing none. Pls Lang!